Two to Tango
by TheDivineMrsH
Summary: Ranma meets Ballroom dancing. Hilarity ensues.
1. Chapter 1

It started out as a typical day. Doesn't it always? Of course it starts out this way. If I'd started the story by writing "It was an eerie, dark and loathsome day---" you would expect something bad to happen to those involved. Unless you're one of those people that likes to psycho-analyze everything from shapes found in pieces of toast or messages on the back of cereal boxes. I am definitely not that kind of person. Where was I…? (Well, maybe I have my moments…) Oh yes, of course, at the beginning.

It started out as a typical day in Nerima, Japan. I was arguing with my…roommate? I'm not really sure what you'd call her. She's the girl I live with. No, it's nothing funny like that. My dad and I moved in with her family two years ago. My dad drug me through the streets of Japan on a cold and rainy day without so much as a reason. Then as soon as we find some place nice and dry, I come to find out it's the domicile of my promised future wife. Who promised? Not me! Well, I suppose that takes care of any theories on whether this story would prove to sound normal. It sounds a bit different now, seeing as this is the first time I've ever had to tell it.

Anyway, my **fiancé**...Akane, and I were arguing as usual. I don't know what it is, but it seems we can never get along. That's just about perfect. Now I know the fates are against me. First, I'm stuck without a choice of whom to marry and second of all, she just so happens to be my polar and absolute opposite. I suppose it could be worse. We could be allergic to each other.

The argument. Well, I can't really tell you why we were fighting. I know what caused it, but I still can't make much sense of it. Akane and I were doing some shopping for her older sister Kasumi. She needed some extra things for that night's dinner. Kasumi is the mother figure of the household. She does the cooking and the cleaning…pretty much everything I wouldn't want Akane to touch with a ten foot pole.

That brings us to the reason we both did the shopping. You see, Kasumi only asked me to go. And I could see Akane watching Kasumi start the stew, I could see the wheels turning in her head. She was probably pondering several noxious combinations of ingredients to throw in there. I had to stop her, for my stomach's sake. So I asked her to come along. Now don't you go thinking I'm an insensitive jerk. I'm very sensitive, just ask my stomach. Akane is pretty darn cute when she tries to be domestic, but why disillusion her more? There are some things you just aren't good at, accept what you're good at and move on.

While I was cruising the aisles for the items we needed, I noticed Akane wasn't following me. I turned the cart around in the direction I last saw her. I spied her by the bakery, eyeing a red velvet cake. Her favorite. I was a bit irritated, and a bit flustered, thinking something had happened to her. I rolled over to her and tapped her on the shoulder. She jumped. Then she smiled.

"Ranma! Doesn't that look amazing?" She asked excitedly.

"It does, but I think you'd better not…" I replied.

"The extra weight is gonna slow you down in practice." I responded rationally.

She responded not so rationally. "What?!" she glowered with menacing eyes.

It was meant to be constructive criticism. Something that I've found Akane has trouble swallowing sometimes. I was only trying to look out for her as a fellow martial artist. Why couldn't she see that?

"I'm just saying you should watch your figure…"

Ok, so maybe I could have been a little bit nicer about it. It's just that… every time I talk to Akane, something unhinges in my brain.

"Really? Well, why don't you watch this?!" She yelled as she made a few jabs at what she thought was my stomach.

It turned out she was only jabbing at the air surrounding her. As always, I jumped out of the way before she could connect.

"See what I mean about slowing you down?"

Ok, I really should have stopped while I was ahead.

"RANMA!!!! YOU JERK!" She yelled as she tried to slap me, I caught her wrist and spun her away from me.

She charged me again and I caught both of her arms and held them behind her back.

"Geez, Akane…I can't take you anywhere without you making a scene.

" She fumed at me.

"Are you going to calm down and behave like a lady?" I asked.

That was a dumb mistake. I'd already slammed her for her weight. Attacking her femininity at this particular juncture was a guaranteed death sentence. She spun out of my hold and ran for the exit.

"Ranma Saotome, I never want to speak to you ever again!" She called over her shoulder.

Alright, I'll admit it, I am an idiot. But you gotta admit, Akane Tendou is the queen of dramatics.

I checked out and paid for the purchases. Then I followed Akane outside. Little did I know that this whole scene had been closely observed by someone despicable.

I was on my way to catching up with her when some girl interjected.

"Pardon me Sir," She politely began

. I glared at her.

"Are you for real? I'm kinda in a hurry right now." I gestured at the dark haired girl running madly through the streets of Nerima.

I started to run after Akane again, but this girl grabbed my shirt sleeve.

"ARG!What is this? Will you just let go?!" I shrugged her hand off my sleeve and continued my sprint toward the fading figure in the distance.

"Akane!!" I called after her. "Akane, wait!"

Akane did not turn to look at me, in fact she didn't pause at all. She sprinted all the way home and I didn't catch up to her until I reached it. She was waiting for me outside, intently looking at the grass, as though any moment it would spring to life with a hat and cane and sing "Hello My Baby".

"Look," I began, "I didn't mean to upset you back there."

"You never mean to." She said in a slightly sarcastic tone.

"For cryin' out loud! I'm trying to apologize here…"

"Yeah, you're doing one hell of a job." Again with the sarcasm. Silence.

Suddenly, up the path strode the icebreaker and misguided answered prayer. The previously mentioned girl from the grocery store parking lot was approaching us, non-deterred and a bit winded.

"Man---You---Guys are fast!" she exclaimed.

"You ran all the way here? Why are you stalking me?"I asked in irritation.

She seemed offended by that.

"I'm not stalking you! Would you two just give me a few seconds of your time?" She pleaded in desperation.

"I…guess…" I reluctantly conceded.

"Alright then. My name is Gena. I was a student at St. Heberke's and I was a proud member of their Dance Club. To be precise, I am a member of their Ballroom Dance Club. Not many schools around here offer that as a club, and I was so excited to be a part of one. That was until Kodachi Kuno took over. She decided to take some lessons late into the school year to impress some guy…"

I gulped.

"Kodachi Kuno never does anything half-way. To make a long story short, she began barking orders, she was named a star pupil by the instructor. She started taking over practices and when we would not perform up to her standard she used persuasive violence. It got to the point where several of the original students have quit the team. I am one of them. She's devoted all of her time to Ballroom Dancing…and she's even been slacking off with her gymnastics. She used to be the star of the gymnastics team and now some say she's going to give it up to concentrate on dance."

"Heartbreaking…." I interrupted, "but what does that have to do with us?"

Gena paused.

"Well…I've decided to transfer schools, I can't stand being around Kodachi, and if I show my face at that school now, she'll treat me as she treats all traitors. Anyway, I plan on attending Furinkan High School and was wondering if you attend there." She looked down at the grass.

"Yes, we do…" Akane answered.

"I can't believe you're just running away like that." I interrupted.

"If dance is what you love then you can't let anyone or anything stop you. You have to overcome challenges." I instructed.

"Well, I suppose you're right. However, Kodachi's always made things pretty miserable for me there. I thought with a new school I could have a new start."

Gena said reluctantly.

"Ranma…" Akane warned.

"Gena, we'll support you at Furinkan. Don't worry…you'll get along there."

Great Akane. You forgot to mention the overly aggressive guys that attend Furinkan.

"Well," Gena paused. "I was actually kinda wondering something else too…"

"What's that?" Akane asked.

Gena blushed slightly. "I couldn't help but watch you in the grocery store. You both move with such speed! Such passion! Such grace! Such flair! And I was wondering…are you two ballroom dancers too?"

Gena... Wow. Talk about hitting a guy below the belt. Compare me to anything manly…a thief, a car repairman, a football mascot for cryin' out loud! But a ballroom dancer?!

"No...we're martial artists." Akane responded.

I couldn't think of anything to say, I was too busy nursing my injured pride.

"Oh," Gena responded, slightly embarrassed. I glared at her. Good. She should be embarrassed…of all the stupid---

"Well," she continued. "You definitely have the potential to be great!"

She paused again. "Could I ask you a favor?" She was looking directly at Akane this time.

"What's that?" Akane inquired.

"Would you be interested in helping me start a ballroom dancing club at Furinkan? You could also take some lessons to try it out, you know, just to see if you like it." Gena added enthusiastically.

Akane thought for a moment. Then she peered up at me with the most evil, maniacal smile I have ever seen.

I wet myself.

"Sure!" She responded without dropping that horrifying smile. "**We'd **love to!"


	2. Chapter 2

Akane and I weren't speaking. At least that's what I'd figured when I left for school the next morning. I gathered my things and I hurried down the stairs. I was running late for being early. If I wanted to beat Akane to school I had to step on it. It's not that I didn't want to resolve things with Akane. It's just that there were two possible outcomes. The first, I would try to resolve things and say something incredibly stupid and offensive. The second, things would be resolved, but at the cost of me being paraded around like a spandex and glitter clad show pony. Damn that woman could be evil sometimes.

As I was stepping through the doorway, I heard Akane bounding down the stairs. She grabbed her shoes and hobbled after me.

"Ranma! Wait!" She called with unexpected enthusiasm. I peered over my shoulder at her. She was just too much sometimes. She was trying to run and put her shoes on at the same time. This could not be good. I met my undoing with a smile.

"You're speaking to me?" I asked, curious.

"Ranma, its silly to fight, I've come to terms with your idiocy." She smiled smugly.

She let me know that whatever it was that she wanted was hers already.

"Oh, great!" I imitated her enthusiasm. "Whatever keeps the tights away."

"Oh…I see. I meant to talk to you about that…" Akane admitted.

"I'm sure you have plenty to say about it." I quipped.

"Well I do! I really think we should help Gena out. She could use some supporting members of the student body." Akane protested.

"Oh I know what you're after. You're just trying to coerce me into taking lessons with you." I accused.

"Though it would be hilarious to see you get in touch with your feminine side, I don't care if you're interested in it or not. Who'd want a clod like you stepping all over her feet? I personally think ballroom dancing looks fun. I'm sure it would help my martial arts a great deal." She defended.

"Oh please tell me you'r ejoking. You? A ballroom dancer? Akane…grace is not in your bag. Smashing bricks…that's in your bag. Smashing skulls…that's in your bag. You're way too clumsy and careless. Do you really want to twirl around in a sparkly dress? And you know you actually have to touch the guy you dance with right? The Akane I know would never…"

I knew it was coming and for all of my best efforts I just couldn't stop myself. I was way too jealous to let her dance with someone else. I had to put the idea out of her head. I saw her eyes fill with anger and I cursed myself mentally. Why did I always have to make her so damn miserable? Now all I needed was Thor's mighty hammer to come down on my head, sending me to the depths of self-loathing. I got the next best thing. Akane's hammer came down on my head , sending me to the depths of unconsciousness.

"I'll prove you wrong!" was the last thing I heard. I knew deep down she would.

When I made it to school, I was twenty minutes late. I had to stand out in the hall and hold two buckets of water until the next class. It really wasn't that big of a deal, I've had worse. Akane's right hook.

Gena was in my second class. She was telling me that she and Akane had made plans to talk to Principal Kuno during lunch today. That was until Akane pulled her by the arm and informed her that "We're not talking to him."

The rest of the day passed in a blur. The next thing I knew, I was sitting in my last class period, wondering what I could ever do to get Akane to notice my presence again. When class ended, I asked her if I could walk her home.

"No thanks," she said coldly. "I'm helping Gena post flyers around school."

"Well, I'd like to help…if you don't mind." She looked at my face, noting whether or not I was sincere. I truly was. When she's upset it drives me crazy. I would have done anything for her forgiveness. That kind of thinking was going to get me a first class ticket to ballroom dancing. All pride be damned.

"Really Ranma?" she asked, but she knew.

"Yes, I'm really sorry about earlier."

"Well…ok." She reluctantly warmed to me.

As Gena, Akane and I distributed the flyers, Akane told me about the conversation they'd had with the principal. They explained to the principal the benefits of having a ballroom dance club. It would teach students to be civilized, sophisticated, well-rounded and upstanding adults. Those were all things he absolutely could not say no to. Before the meeting ended he began searching for an instructor to lead the club.

While they talked, I posted the last flyer in the hall next to the library. It was odd that I somehow felt lighter. I felt a little less gloomy when I looked at the dancing couple on the flyer. They were poised in some classical dance pose. The woman wore a long flowing gown and the gentleman wore a tuxedo with tails. As I stared at the picture, I thought of Akane in a dress like the woman's. I thought of her dancing the night away with that kind of grace. I blushed when I realized that I'd pictured myself in that scene too.

"Well, that's enough for one day," Gena announced, pulling me out of my daydream. "Yeah," I nodded, "That's for sure."


	3. Chapter 3

For the first time in I don't remember how long, I enjoyed a relaxing evening at the Tendo household. There could never be a moment's peace as long as Ukyou, Shampoo and Ryoga knew where I lived. I wondered what they were up to; it had been days since I'd seen any of them.

Ukyou was a girl that I'd been promised to marry. No, I did not promise. My father promised. It was a situation much like Akane's. However, Akane was much less open to the idea than Ukyou. My dad made this bargain with her father for what else? Food. My father was a true glutton if there ever was one. I guess he figured someday he'd have more than one son and everything would even out. The problem was, he promised me to Akane first. I know where my loyalties lie.

Shampoo is a Chinese Amazon that I defeated in combat. Apparently I'm supposed to marry her according to Chinese Amazon law. What the hell? Maybe that jargon flies over there, but as long as my feet are planted firmly on Japanese soil, there's no way I'm marrying that purple-haired, co-dependent psychopath. Don't get me wrong; she's a nice girl and all…if you're into pushy, thieving, conniving, clingy and obsessive. She's just not my type. Not to mention that she's always trying to kill Akane.

Ryoga was a different breed altogether. We knew each other when we were younger. I took food from him and he challenged me to a fight in his back yard. I waited three days for the bum and he didn't show. Then he started calling **me** a coward. Come to find out, he got lost and didn't make it home until I'd given up on him. He chased me all over creation and because of me, he fell into a cursed spring. Ever since then, he's been hell-bent on making my life miserable. Oh yeah and he's totally enamored with Akane. The biggest irritation of all is that I can't figure out if he really has feelings for her. I think he just wants her because she belongs to me and she makes me happy. Well…she doesn't technically belong to me, but there's a possibility she will someday.

Akane and I were watching a movie on tv. It was an action thriller and just happened to be one of my favorites. I was pretty engrossed in it and never noticed when Akane stole the remote away. I did, however, notice when Bruce Willis turned into some girl with a sequined dress.

"Hey!" I protested.

It was the best part of the movie after all. Things were about to be blown up!

"Ranma, don't start. You've seen that movie a million times." Akane scolded.

"Yeah but I want to see it a million and one times." I argued.

"Ranma, you have it on DVD."

Ok she had me there. The girl on TV was now twirling about on the arm of some guy.

"What is _**this**_?" I asked in disgust.

"It's a ballroom dance competition. I saw it was going to be on tonight in the TV guide. I really want to see what ballroom looks like."

It was Akane's turn to focus her attention on the TV screen. I frowned in disapproval, but eventually found myself watching the program without complaint.

"They're amazing!" Akane exclaimed.

"Yeah…" I agreed as I watched the dancers move across the floor, perfectly synchronized.

I stole a quick glance at Akane. She was beaming ear to ear. For a brief second I wished that I could make her smile like that.

"How wonderful!" exclaimed a voice from behind.

It was Kasumi, standing in the doorway. She was watching the dancers just as intently as Akane.

"It's settled!" Akane enthusiastically exclaimed. "I'm going to do this!"

"Akane? You're going to take up ballroom dancing?" Kasumi asked innocently.

"Yes…" Akane timidly answered.

"Akane that's great! I've always wanted to try it. You have to show me everything you learn!' Kasumi instructed.

"Sure, Sis." Akane agreed. "My first lesson will be tomorrow after school." She announced proudly.

Kasumi smiled and turned away to finish washing the dishes.

"Ranma?"

"Mmmhmm?" I answered her.

"Will you go with me?" She asked innocently.

"Akane…you know how I feel about it." I simply stated.

"Ranma…" she pleaded.

"I'm not going to be a ballroom dancer and that is final. I will help with anything else, but not that." I reasoned.

"Fine." She grumbled, picked herself of the floor and headed for her room.

"Good luck tomorrow…" I called over my shoulder, entranced by the dancers on TV.

"Next up is the tango!" the announcer called. "All contestants please make your way to the dance floor."

The announcer continued to call a series of numbers and couples were paraded around the floor. As the music started I saw a dance that was unlike anything I'd ever seen before. It was passionate, if not borderline raunchy at times. I noticed something that was different about the dancers too. Particularly the women. That detail was the clothing, or lack thereof, worn by some of the women. OK! I fumed as I snapped of the TV. Akane is _SO_ not doing this.

I grumbled to myself all the way up the stairs and all the way to my room. I grumbled in bed until I finally fell asleep.

The bell rang, signaling the last period of the day had just ended. I promised Akane I would wait with her after school and meet the new instructor. She asked me several times to reconsider my decision to let her go it alone. I happen to think I was being rather generous when I offered to wait with her.

I saw her standing outside, talking to someone familiar. As I was approaching I caught the gist of the conversation.

"Oh thank you for meeting with me Ryoga!" Akane gushed.

"N-no problem." Ryoga stammered like a buffoon.

"I've joined a ballroom dancing club at school, and I was wondering if you'd want to be my dance partner for this afternoon." Akane asked.

Ryoga's head nearly exploded. He turned several shades of red…then a disturbing shade of green.

"Oh Akane---I—I'd love to! But…I can't dance." He sheepishly admitted.

He was like a helpless newborn baby. Women couldn't help but feel sorry for him. What a chump.

"Oh that's alright, this is a lesson. I don't know what I'm doing either." Akane admitted.

"Well then sure!" Ryoga yelled.

'Psh…she sure moved on fast.' I thought to myself. There was no way I was going to be the third wheel.

'I'm outta here.' I thought to myself.

As I turned to leave, however, I thought about Akane and Ryoga dancing together. I thought about the tango on the TV last night. 'Ok,' I thought. 'They can _think_ I'm outta here.' And I hid myself in the gymnasium, under the bleachers, ready to spy.

They met up with Gena and walked into the school gymnasium. This was the only designated place the club had to practice, and it had to be shared with every other extracurricular activity known to Furinkan.

"He should be here anytime…" Gena stated while looking at her watch.

"He?" Akane asked, astounded.

"Yes, he's supposed to be one of the worlds finest ballroom dancers." Gena commended.

"Oh, I just kinda figured the instructor would be a woman." Akane said to herself.

Just then, the gymnasium doors burst open and a figure wih fiery red hair and goatee sauntered into the room.

"I have arrived!" He announced with giddy enthusiasm.

Akane, Ryoga and Gena were speechless.

"Vat? With ze gaping and ze standing? Et is dance dance time!!" The gentleman announced in an accent that could be described as a blend of French and German.

"Allow me to eentroduce myself! My name is Casper." He said with a frightening grin.

'Casper?' I thought to myself, and seriously pondered if the gym doors had opened up another dimension.

"Uh…hi." Gena said nervously. "This is Akane, and Ryoga, and I'm Gena."

"Hello," Akane responded.

"Hello…" Ryoga said, petrefied.

Casper inspected Akane, Ryoga and Gena.

"Well…with a bit of mooscle…you'll be faboolous." He confirmed.

"Yes, my name is Casper…Casper Von Vasquez." He smiled in expectation.

"Oh…" Gena said timidly.

"That's a unique last name, Sir…I've never heard it before." Akane admitted.

"Vat? Insulting!... Ok, I teach. My Mottar and Footar we're Spanish Viennese immigrants. Zey were ze best ballroom dancers ze world has ever known. Dance ees in de blood." Casper stated proudly.

"Er…" Gena hesitated.

"Well, that's nice…" Akane offered.

"Enough chat! Ve Vork now."

I watched as Casper, eccentric but extremely talented, taught Akane and Ryoga the basics that Gena had already mastered.

"Chin up boy, chin up!" Casper tapped Ryoga on the head.

"Oh my my my…zis is terrible! You must hold ze frame…but try not to look like ze bride of frankundstein! Too steef!" Casper instructed.

Casper instructed them in the footwork of the Waltz. Before long, he had put music on a worn out record player and instructed Akane and Ryoga to dance. Casper took Gena to the center of the floor and began to waltz with her. "Zat is very nice…" he complimented Gena.

I watched Akane and Ryoga, my main focus. Ryoga was stepping all over poor Akane's feet like a jackass. Finally, Casper stomped over to Ryoga and made him dance with Gena. He muttered something about drunken elephants. I couldn't help but laugh. It was too reactionary to stifle. Oh well. I was sure nobody had heard me anyway, the music was far too loud.

Suddenly, something…or someone…was pulling me up from my hiding spot by my pigtail.

"Vat es dees?" Casper had a tight grip on my hair.

"OW!" I yelped.

"A pepping poodle?" he deduced.

"A what? No…I don't _pep_. I'm just here to watch." I corrected.

"No vatch! Dance pig-tail boy!" Casper instructed. Then he half threw, half pushed me into Akane.

Then casper came within an inch of my face. "I know what you think. You think I sissy, frou-frou nancy-boy ballroom dancer." He glared daggers. "You wrong. I sissy, frou-frou nancy-boy ballroom dancer with the most graceful kick ze world has ever seen!" He spat. He leaned back and did an impressive, graceful fan kick over my head, mere millimeters away from connecting. Then Casper reared his head back like a threatened cobra, and stared. I swear I heard him hiss at me.

"Ranma!" Akane exclaimed in anger. "Why were you spying on me?" she accused.

"Ranma! That's just like you to ruin my perfect afternoon with Akane." Ryoga's voice boomed.

"A pep pep pep! No talk. Dance poopils." Casper instructed.

How I survived that practice, I'll never know. The next day, I did notice a welt, oddly shaped like the end of Akane's hammer. Perhaps it will just have to remain one of life's unsolved mysteries.


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for the reviews everyone!

Chapters 4 and 5 were originally combined but it was so long that I had to split them up.

I hope you enjoy!

-TheDivineMRSH-

"You'd better tell me what happened in practice the other night…" I warned Akane.

"Casper said you need a lot of work if you ever wanted to consider yourself good enough to polish his shoes…and that he needed a few stiff drinks." Akane casually responded.

"Great! Now would you get to the part about the lump on my head?" I snapped.

"Sure!" Akane offered. "You got fresh…so I popped you good."

"What?!" Incredulous! Like I'd ever get fresh with that…that…_tomboy_.

"Fiance or no fiancé, I just don't tolerate that." Akane rationed.

"I remember some of practice the other day. It's funny that those memories haven't surfaced."

"With your past?" she scoffed. "It could happen."

"So it didn't?" I implied. She responded only with a smile and a chuckle. She ran off in the direction of the school and I followed after her.

"Don't forget we have practice tonight, in the gym again!" She yelled back over her shoulder.

Little did I know; someone else had witnessed our conversation. Hours later the walls would come crashing down."

Ah! Pepping Poodle! You're back with zevengence? Non? 'Ow ees your 'ead?" Casper greeted me with a face I hoped never to see in my nightmares.

"Ah…well, I've had worse." I admitted.

I stepped inside the gymnasium. Gena and Akane were already warming up and stretching. Ryoga was standing there gawking at them both. A _**pig**_ in every sense of the word. I took my spot next to them and joined them.

Casper was nodding to the rhythm of whatever ancient song he'd drudged up. Silently I watched him. As Casper nodded he sang, off-key, garbled words that would be lost on any ethnicity.What coo-coo planet did Principal Kuno's spaceship land on to find this nut job? I continued to stretch and I pondered how much Casper was like our principal.

"Alright poopils, enough stretch…I have annoncemont. As part of dees club, you will be required to have parfarmonce. Yes? First, will be parfarmonce at school convacashion. Du, parfarmonce at local beginnar contest." Casper beamed brightly. "You will be parfarming ze Waltz first, however, ze secont dance vill be chasen by student et chareographed by student."

"So, you are saying that we will all dance a Waltz and then our second dance will be our choice? And we have to write it?" Gena clarified.

"But of course!" Casper confirmed.

"Ah hell!" Ryoga whined. "I'm no good at this!"

"Don't worry Ryoga, we can practice together on our own…you'll have me to help." Gena reassured him.

He smiled shyly then turned his attention to me.

"Don't think you can get away with your scheme. Asking Akane for extra help just so you can grope her... I'm on to you, buddy. I'll be watching."

"Yeah, I know you will P-Chan, you always stick your snout where it doesn't belong." I retaliated.

Akane smacked me in the back of the head, right on the lump she'd given me previously.

"OW! What was that for?" I demanded

"Quit being mean to Ryoga!"

"Enough! Zis ees ballroom dancing! Not Springer's Days of Our Creek Babies!" Casper bellowed. He let out an audible, exasperated sigh.

"Are ze always zis crahzy?" He whispered to Gena.

"Have been as long as I've known them." She confirmed.

"Dance time now." He turned on the music and waved us on. He traveled around the room to critique all the dancers.

I took Akane in my arms. It was so nice having her there, no matter how brief. She looked so cute that day too. She was wearing my favorite sweater that she owned. It was pink and a bit off the shoulder. And she smelled really good too…

"You're stepping on my foot." Akane complained.

"Sorry." I moved my foot.

"You're stepping on my OTHER foot." Akane warned, more irritated.

I moved it.

"Ow, my foot!"

"_**Damn**_ it, Woman! How many feet do you have? Maybe if your feet weren't so big it'd be easier to miss 'em."

"What did you say?" She asked as her laser eyes bore holes in my skull.

"I uh…said your hair looks lovely." 

"Ranma!" She charged at me all the way to the other side of the gym.

Little to my surprise, Gena and Ryoga stopped dancing. Gena was quite stunned and Ryoga was more than happy to witness my demise.

Akane flung her arms out to hit me but I caught them and rapidly spun her away. She kicked her leg at my head. I grabbed her ankle and threw her backwards.

"Mahvaloose…" Casper exclaimed in astonishment.

She tried a fan kick to my head but I ducked. In her confusion I used a foot sweep on her. She lost her balance and I caught her in my arms.

Casper and Gena looked at each other in acknowledgement.

"Tango…" they confirmed in unison.

Akane looked at Casper and Gena.

"What did you say?" She asked nervously.

"Ze Tango! You must do ze Tango! " Casper jumped up and down like a Wack-a-Mole on Prozac.

He clapped his hands together and kept repeating "Ze Tango! Ze Tango! We learn ze Tango!"

So, once we finished our waltz lesson for the day, we began to learn the basics of Tango. Casper demonstrated the mens' footwork first, then the womens'. Once we had mastered the most basic of steps, we partnered up again. I've got to tell you, when you put the footwork together with your partner's it looks nothing like it did by itself.

The basics of Tango were much like the fundamentals of martial arts. It was based on quick, timed, and precise movements. I didn't know much about ballroom, but Tango seemed to come so much easier to me than the Waltz. Akane was getting pretty good two.

"I'm watching you Saotome," Ryoga growled from nearby.

"Great, I hope you're enjoying this." I grinned as I dipped Akane, then smoothly swung her up to my chest.

"Ranma!" She protested. "Warn me before you decide to do that! And we haven't even learned those moves yet!"

All in all, practice wasn't half bad. I wouldn't say that I'd be willing to hang up martial arts to become a professional ballroom dancer…but it was ok.

When I made it home from practice, I was winded and plenty exhausted. Who knew that ballroom dancing would take such endurance? I plodded up the stairs to my room, totally beat.

Despite my exhaustion and my best efforts, I couldn't sleep at all that night. I was up thinking about Akane. I thought about how much she had improved, how graceful she had seemed…and how nice it was to hold her.

It was too bad that I didn't get any sleep, I was sure going to need it the next day.


	5. Chapter 5

I bolted out the door. Late again. If I received another tardy, I'd have to spend the whole day holding buckets of water. Akane had left for school twenty minutes ago. I had ten minutes to be in my seat. I sprinted as fast as my legs could carry me, which wasn't very fast, considering my sleep deprived state.

The school was getting closer and time was running out. I reached the gate with a minute to spare. As I entered the gate, I saw upperclassman Kuno and his posse waiting outside. By the way he frantically waved his wooden sword, it was obvious he was waiting for me.

"Saotome!" He barked.

"Save it Kuno, I'm late." I cut him off.

"Your dance of life has a bittersweet ending." He replied smugly as he threw something at me.

I bent down to pick it up. It was a picture of me holding Akane. Yesterday's dance practice.

"Where did you get this?" I demanded.

"The hero answers not to the villain." He smugly replied.

"You have been bewitching the beloved Akane Tendo with the art of dance. Knave, you have danced your last. Today, I shall send you to your maker. I shall be present for the ballroom dance club meeting this afternoon. The Furinkan High School gymnasium shall be your final resting place, Marmot."

"Are you by any chance related to Casper Von Vasquez?" I asked in amazement.

"No…why do you ask?"

"No reason." I responded as I quickly made my get away.

"Damn you Saotome! Damn you and your mind trickery!" He shouted after me.

Yeah you guessed it; I was tardy. There I was holding buckets of water all day long. I had nothing else to do but dread my own existence. My arms ached. I set the buckets down quietly at my feet. Nobody would notice anyway. Everyone was in class, the last class of the day.

I stretched my arms, shoulders and my back. I lunged to stretch out my legs. Just then a thought occurred to me. Everything was still, nobody was around…who would care if I practiced a little?

'Alright then…'

I practiced the waltz footwork first. That was the hardest. It was really hard to count in threes. I pretended I was holding Akane in my arms and I tried to do a turn. I completely fumbled on the first try.

'That's ok…no harm done. Do it again.'

I got back into the rhythm and led the turn once more. I nailed it.

"SAOTOME!" a voice bellowed, even though the owner of it was a foot away. My English teacher.

"Pick up those buckets! And stop hobbling around like a flibity jibbit!"

"Yes, Sir."

I made my way to the gymnasium. There was no sign of Kuno or his posse. I really thought I had lucked out. When I entered the gym, I noticed that there was a new member to our club. Daisuke, my buddy.

"Hey Daisuke! What are you doing here?" I asked as I walked over to him.

"Well…" he paused. "When I saw this picture," the one of me and Akane from yesterday, "I thought to myself, If this helped Ranma get Akane…then maybe it will bring me luck.

"Where did you get that picture?" I demanded. I was left unanswered, however, when a blur of purple and metal whizzed into the room. It was Shampoo (with Mousse clinging to her leg) and Ukyou.

"Ranma!" A chorus of enraged female voices beckoned me.

"Why you no dance with Shampoo?" she demanded.

"Ranma, really…if you wanted to dance you could have picked a better partner than Akane." Ukyou scoffed.

"I uh…" It was no use trying to explain.

"Shampoo, I'll dance with you!" Mousse begged. Shampoo thwarted him.

"Excuuueeeeeese me lahdies. Ze gentahlman dances wit ze lahdy." Casper instructed. He gestured at Akane.

"Prepare to die violent girl"

"Sorry Akane, but Ranma will be dancing the Tango with me." Ukyou pulled out her giant spatula.

"Did I not zay ze GENTAHLMAN dances wit ZE LAHDY!" Casper bellowed.

"EEP!" Shampoo and Ukyou squeaked in unison.

"BALLROOM dancing ees for ze alite. Not for coo coo heads raised by veasels!!!!

"I uh…" Ukyou stammered.

"NO TALK! If you vish to dance, find anozer partner. If refoose to covaporate I will Sqveese you like a POPPLE!"

"Shampoo dance with Mousse." Shampoo declared flatly.

"OH! REALLY?!" At least there was one happy camper.

"Who's gunna be my partner?" Ukyou pouted. She looked at me with devious eyes.

"I'll be your partner!" Ryoga cheerfully volunteered.

"Hey! Wait just a minute---" Gena protested.

"I'll dance with you." Daisuke offered.

"Um…er…Ok." Gena accepted the offer. Daisuke blushed.

When everything seemed to be in order, we found what was unaccounted for.

"The Blue Thunder has darkened this doorstep. I have declared this war. Stand and fight, Coward!"

Kuno. Who else?

Not without Sasuke, of course. Sasuke cowered behind Kuno and only occasionally poked his head out to offer a taunting grin.

"''Oo 'ee es a strahnge von." Casper whispered to Akane. Akane nodded in frustration.

"I shall dance with Akane Tendo." Kuno declared as her turned his attention to Casper.

"Ah vell ef et eesn't Dahn Quixote…and ees fvat frahnd Sancho Panza." Casper greeted him.

Kuno stood before him, baffled.

"Vell, et es your lahky day, no? Today ve learn social grahces. Ahvery knight should know dees. But you are massinfahrmed. Ze LAHDY dances vit ZE GENTLEMAN!" Casper barked.

This was proof that Casper had the power intimidate anyone. Kuno turned away, deterred and dejected. He crawled under the bleachers and pulled out a head of brown hair.

"I shall dance with Nabiki Tendo." He declared.

"Vary nance." Casper complimented.

"Nabiki!" Akane yelled. "You're behind all this?"

"Did you ever have a doubt?" I asked casually.

"Come all, mahk vit ze dance dance now, yah?" Casper instructed.


	6. Chapter 6

"Nabiki!" Akane gritted through her teeth when she and Kuno whirled closer to us. Nabiki just chuckled llightly. "Hey, I have to support my lavish lifestyle somehow." She shrugged nervously.

"Saotome…if you think I shall let you enchant the pure and chaste Akane Tendo with your mind trickery, you are horrifyingly mistaken." Kuno bellowed.

I simply ignored him. There was no use reasoning with a buffoon. Especially not one of Kuno's stature. I watched him as they inched their way closer.

"Kuno…" Nabiki began to warn him.

They were coming up on a corner, they had to turn or else he would run Nabiki straight into a wall. Kuno wasn't paying attention to Nabiki, he was looking straight at me.

"Uh…Kuno…" I gestured at the wall as I led Akane around the corner.

"Do not speak to me, Vile, pig-tail donning Wizard. The wrath of heaven is surely upon th----" Kuno had backed Nabiki into the wall.

"DAMN IT! I can't turn!" Kuno exclaimed.

"Oh for Pete's sake!" Nabiki complained.

"It was Saotome! He's placed us in some sort of force-field with his malicious mystical powers!"

"Kuno…" Nabiki began.

She was prepared to tell him how completely idiotic that sounded. She realized, however, that Kuno and reason had never been properly introduced. Chances were good that she could use his thick head to her advantage.

"Nice use of alliteration." She complimented.

He grinned at her.

"Thank you, you see I find it makes any sentence more---"

"Kuno baby…" she interrupted.

"Turn! Here, like this…" she took over and led the turn for him.

"Oh…how odd. I remember learning that… from some other time...from some other dimension." He mused.

"I wouldn't be a bit surprised." Nabiki said in honesty.

Despite the death threats from those around me, I was really enjoying myself. My dancing had improved, (at least I thought so) I was getting along with Akane, and I was beginning to feel comfortable with the concept of ballroom dancing. There's something I thought I'd never say. Waltz was becoming easier to me. I just had to remember to count the beats in my head, while at the same time try not to concentrate to hard so that I wouldn't run Akane into the other couples.

"Hey! I am supposed to lead!" Ryoga whined.

"I'm not leading…I'm just …guiding." Ukyou defended herself.

"The MEN lead!" Ryoga fumed.

"For cryin' in the sink! What is this, 1950?" Ukyou scoffed.

Casper tapped Ukyou on the shoulder.

"Esssscuuuuse me. Ze men lead ze waltz."

"What?! That's a bunch of horse sh----"

"Ah! Ze men lead ze Waltz….zat ees ballroom standard. " "I suppose I am a bit o ze foody-doody. Ze 1950s vas a time when ze women did not spak like ze sailors, non?"

Ukyou silenced herself, though rage was clearly leaking out her ears.

"Fine Ryoga, take a crack at it." Ukyou self-righteously conceded.

"Finally!" Ryoga matched her when it came to being Self-righteous.

He began to lead Ukyou around the dance floor. He demonstrated great technique, mastery of the footwork, and perfect timing! I had plenty of time to admire it all as he headed straight for Akane and I. It was a head-on collision in the making.

"Ranma!" He shouted as I tried to move around him.

"Why are you blocking my dance path?" He grunted.

"Uh, Sugar?" Ukyou held his attention.

"What is it NOW?" he bellowed

She gestured at the other dancing couples. Ryoga took a second to look past us and I watched his face as it sunk in.

"We're going the wrong way!" Ukyou shouted.

Ryoga's face flushed.

"Ukyou…could you help me turn around?" He asked sheepishly.

"Sure." She replied cooly.

She led him back into the flow of the dancers.

"You better never complain about me leading again." She threatened.

"It wasn't my fault! Casper got me flustered and I couldn't figure out which way to turn." Ryoga defended.

"You could have asked for directions." Ukyou offered.

"This is ballroom dancing, not a road trip!" He exploded.

"Yeah well, I see it as the same principal. Typical man to get turned around and refuse to ask for help. Just face it Ryoga, you'd be lost without me." She grinned.

I'd slowed down to allow Ukyou and Ryoga to get turned around. Shampoo and Mouse were now right behind us. I could over hear part of their conversation.

"Now Ranma dance with Shampoo for sure!" I heard her whisper.

She pulled a small bag out from the top of her dress. The bag looked an awful lot like the one she kept paralysis powder in. I could hear her laughing maniacally as Mouse frantically tried to yank it away from her.

"Shampoo! I won't let you do this! You're dancing with ME!" He shouted in a tone almost like begging.

I apparently wasn't the only one who heard them.

"Someone should really explain to her that she can't use a gag more than once. It's called cliché." Akane smiled.

Of course Akane would know; she had been a victim of Shampoo's paralysis powder.

Something snatched the bag away from Shampoo. It was Casper and he had one of those cobra-ready-to-strike stares.

"No pahrfarmonce enhancing droogs! Eef you vant to chet, try ze bahseball." He hissed at Shampoo and turned on his heel.

Just to change it up a bit, Casper decided the last part of practice we would learn the Cha Cha. He said it was time to break free of our trivial mundane existences. At least, that's what I thought. I never really knew what Casper was saying. Once he taught the footwork, we had to put what we learned into practice with our partner. Casper went around to critique all the couples. He stopped at Ryoga and Ukyou.

"VAT is ZEES?" His eyes widened.

He watched Ryoga attempt to attain, what he referred to as "Ze latin motion…in ze heeps!". This basically translates into 'Your hips need to move in a way that no man's should.'

"What am I doing wrong?" Ryoga challenged.

"Ze heeps! Ze heeps! You seely spidar monkey."

Ryoga scratched his head. "I don't get it."

Casper's eyes bulged in frustration.

"Have you evar…….made ze tender love to ze vomens?"

Ryoga paused, trying desperately to translate. When he realized what he was being asked he blushed a deep scarlet red.

"WHAT?! …No." Ryoga answered, utterly humiliated.

"I see. You vill never, eef you move like zat." Casper grumbled, then he moved on to the next couple.

"Ah, Purple-haired trahmp ees not bad." Casper complimented Shampoo. "A smoodge too ahggresseeve." He stated. "Also, you need better control of ze arms."

"Long-haired boy! Vy are you dancing with ze mop? Ze lahdy ees over here!" Casper yelled at Mouse, who apparently stumbled into the janitor's closet and found a mop that resembled his Shampoo.

"OH! Hahaha…just thought I'd tidy up. Where is my Shampoo?" He demanded.

He grabbed Casper's hand and began leading him into the Cha Cha.

"What hairy hands you have Shampoo. It's kind of nice. It reminds me of my mother."

Casper thumped Mouse on the head, sending him sprawling to the floor.

"Marmot."

Casper strode over to Nabiki and Kuno, who were really quite impressive. Kuno was amazing. He could lead Nabiki into turns and swish his hips without even missing a beat. And why on **Earth** would I be jealous of **that**? Armageddon must surely be near.

Finally, as if you couldn't have guessed, it was our turn.

"Ze heeps!" Casper shouted at me as I tried as hard as I could to throw all of my masculine pride out the window.

Eventually, I caught on…I think. I couldn't really tell. Casper kept making these weird clicking sounds and he kept shaking his head.

"Mz. Tendo, you need to work on ze arms. Vary nice ozer vise."

I had to agree with Casper there, she was doing rather nicely. She had such precise, progressive movement. I was more of a plodder myself. I couldn't help but admire her. She had really come a long way, and she was so happy! She seemed to enjoy life so much more. It had been quite awhile since we'd had the slightest argument.

If that was the result of learning to ballroom dance, it was worth any degradation and emasculation Casper could throw at me.


	7. Chapter 7

Gena and Daisuke joined Akane and I on our walk home.

"Seriously, Daisuke…I had no idea you could waltz like that." I commented

Daisuke had always been clumsier than me. He was noticeably more awkward.

Yet, somehow on the dance floor he'd surpassed me. I don't know why, but it kinda bothered me.

"Yeah…well…I have a really great teacher." He shyly admitted.

Gena blushed.

"Well not really. We practice together and I've taught him what I know." Gena corrected.

"Oh I see. So it's like that." I teased. However, not without experiencing Akane's elbow jabbing my ribs.

"We just practice together." Daisuke said flatly.

"Practice what together? Kissing?" I innocently implied.

"Ranma! Leave them alone! Honestly, you're such a child." Akane scolded.

Ok maybe I was a bit jealous of Daisuke. Daisuke didn't seem to mind. We're guys, we razz each other all the time. And yeah, I was a bit bitter. I would like it if Akane and I could get along better. Daisuke didn't know that. Or...maybe he did and that's why he didn't say anything when I teased him.

"So what dance are you two choreographing?" Akane asked.

"We're doing the rumba. It's Gena's favorite." Daisuke replied.

Akane's eyes widened.

"Isn't that the dance of love or something?" She asked, slightly embarrassed.

"Well…yes." Gena answered timidly as she swept her strawberry hair out of her face.

"But I like it because it's challenging. Also, the tempo is much slower than other Latin dances, so it's easier for Daisuke to learn the steps." She finished.

"Wow…" Akane was astounded. "We haven't even learned that one yet!"

"I know…" Gena agreed. "Casper said we could do it since I have danced it before. We should be learning it at the next practice."

"Oh I hope so! I want to learn all of the dances, even if I have to settle for a partner like _him_."

She implied 'Ranma' as she gestured to me. She grinned her maniacal grin and I just rolled my eyes.

"The only kind of strange thing is that when you perform the rumba, you have to pretend that you're in love with whomever you are dancing with. It's not just about mastering the steps, it's also about putting emotion into the dance." Gena explained.

"I'd have to pretend I'm in love with…" Akane paused as she looked over at me. I waved. Hysterical laughter erupted in her direction.

Would it really be that much of a stretch? We were already masters at pretending any way. Not to say that I was open to the idea.

"Well this is my stop." Gena said with a smile. She turned toward her gate and Daisuke followed behind her. "See ya tomorrow!" She called over her shoulder and Daisuke smiled.

"Bye guys, see you later. Good luck." Akane smiled. I waved them good bye.

I walked Akane the rest of the way home. It was a very quiet, very tense walk home. When we arrived at the Tendo residence, Akane went ahead inside. I decided I could use a workout in the training hall. I had been neglecting my martial arts. Akane had been also.

I just couldn't clear my head. For once, I couldn't come out of it. The harder I trained, the more I thought of the one subject that would be the death of me. We don't have to name names here.

Once I finished training, I ran up to Akane's room… for more training. I knocked on her door.

She opened the door hesitantly. Her face reflected her surprise and mild irritation.

"What do you want Ranma?"

"I was just wondering if you'd like to practice." I tried to sound as casual as possible.

To my surprise, she was sold on the idea.

"I would very much like to." She answered with a smile. "I never thought you'd volunteer."

She invited me in her room. That was very rare. Normally, I never really asked for her permission…which lead to a pummeling all too familiar.

"I think we should work on the waltz first," Akane instructed. "since that is probably the dance I struggle the most with. " "I agree. I don't think you struggle with it at all. If you did, it would only be because I'm leading you." I admitted. Since when did I become so noble as to admit my faults to Akane?

Akane smiled and stalked off to her stereo. She put in a cd that she'd mixed herself. The CD player was set on track 4. She smiled at me and I took my cue.

"Shall we?" I smiled and I offered my arm.

"Of course." She replied.

The music began, a robust piano melody that I'd heard somewhere before. It was one of my favorite bands, Ben Folds Five. I remembered the name of the tune after a few measures. It was Lullaby, and apparently one of Akane's favorite.

As we danced to the music, I let my thoughts wander back to where they were headed when I was practicing my martial arts. There was such significance to the word 'partner' and how often we'd been using it. We were partners in many ways. We'd shared life changing experiences, challenges, and someday (if our parents had our way) we'd be sharing ownership of the Tendo dojo, once we were married. Come to think of it, we'd done quite well together.

I whirled Akane into a turn and pulled her back to me in time with the music.

'_Let the moonlight take the lid off your dreams._' I heard Ben sing in the background.

"Ranma…are you ok?" She asked me hesitantly.

"Yeah, I'm just fine." I answered.

"You're being really quiet."

What could I say? Certainly not what was on my mind. She'd kill me! It was a miracle that I was holding her hand without getting knocked into next week. And that was what I loved about Akane. Not being knocked into next week, I loved that she didn't try to force herself on me, like all the others. She never pretended to be anything she wasn't just to win me over. She was completely herself all the time, take it or leave it.

"Ranma…" her persistent voice beckoned me back to reality.

"Maybe I've learned my lesson." I managed to say with a smile.

She laughed as I spun her into a turn.

"I highly doubt it. I think your foot has been surgically attached to the inside of your mouth." She smirked.

I dipped her. Yeah, I know it probably wasn't appropriate but it made her laugh.

"Hey!" she protested.

"Like it or not, I lead…" I warned with a grin as I lifted her up.

"So you'd better start being nice to me."

Maybe she didn't notice it then, but I did. She moved the slightest bit closer to me. I could sense she was more welcoming of my embrace.

"I'll consider it." She whispered with a sly smile.

The song faded out and I kept holding on to her. What was more out of place was that Akane was letting me. Another song started. Thank goodness it was a slow one. It wasn't a waltz, but it was slow enough that we could sway back and forth to the music. She put her arms around my neck and I continued to lead her.

_If ever you are feeling like you're tired  
And all your uphill struggles  
leave you headed downhill  
If you realize your wildest  
dreams can hurt you  
And your appetite for pain  
has drinken its fill…_

I tried to steal a glance at her face. She was staring at the floor, but I could tell by how she danced that she was enjoying being like this with me.

_I ask of you a very simple question  
Did you think for one minute that you are alone  
And is your suffering a privilege you share only  
Or did you think that everybody else feels completely at home_

Just wait  
Just wait  
Just wait  
And it will come

I wrapped my arms tightly around her. I didn't know how long this moment would last and I tried to hold on to it and her for as long as I was allowed.

_If you think I've given up on you you're crazy  
And if you think I dont love you well then youre just wrong…_

I smiled down at her, realizing that the singer had said every word I'd meant to. It was odd…It seemed every song I heard was like a soundtrack to my life.

She caught me looking at her, she smiled too.

_In time you just might take to feeling better  
Time is the beauty of the road being long…_

How was this happening? Wasn't it just a few days ago that she never wanted to talk to me again? I never should have taken her generosity for granted. So what if she couldn't cook, she did try really hard for me after all. It dawned on me just then. Yes, I really was that thickheaded. When she cooked for me, and invited me to dance with her…it was all her efforts to get closer to me. She needed me to appreciate her.

_I know that now you feel no consolation  
But maybe if I told you and informed you out loud…_

Our eyes met again. This time she leaned in closer to me and tilted her face upward, it was almost even with mine.

_I say this without fear of hesitation  
I can honestly tell you that you make me proud…_

I thought about what I should say and maybe what I should do. But I just stood there like an idiot. I never made a move. I know what I should have done. I know what I'd do now if I'd had the chance. I would have risked the pummeling.

_Just wait  
Just wait  
Just wait  
And it will come…_

Eventually, Akane moved away from me. She walked over to the CD player and turned it off.

"I uh….I think we'd better work on our tango." She stammered.

"Yeah…I agreed. I guess we've had enough waltz for today." I managed to choke out.

Akane just nodded her head.

"We'd better choose music first." She suggested, changing the subject.

She pulled out a case full of old CDs and records.

"What are all a'those?" I raised my eyebrow skeptically.

"Casper let me look through them. I had no tango music." Akane answered casually.

"Oh…well let's have a look." I squatted down and began pawing through them.

Akane joined me. She started tossing some of them on the floor with a profound "Nope."

I looked at the first CD I had in my hand. 'Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer'. I flipped over the back of the CD and spied the list of songs.

"The Masochism Tango", I read aloud.

Akane and I looked at each other in surprise. I put the CD into the CD player and set it on track 10. We listened and we grinned the whole time. It would be cheesy, hilarious and totally…us. It was perfect.

"This is the one." Akane confirmed. "Let's get to work."


	8. Chapter 8

"I'm so excited about practice!" Akane exclaimed as we walked to school.

I was kinda looking forward to it too. Today we were going to learn the Foxtrot and Jive. I'd learned that Jive was a form of swing dancing. It was what I was looking forward to the most. Out of all the dances, Jive was definitely the coolest. It was quite possibly the most macho anyway. Foxtrot wouldn't be so bad either. It makes me think of Fred Astaire. He was a ladies' man, so this dance would be doable. Casper had also said there would be a special surprise for us at the end of the lesson. This made me both intrigued and feared for my life. At least practice would prove to be interesting.

"Yeah, I'd like to see what Jive's all about." I shared aloud.

"Doesn't it sound fun? I'm glad we're martial artists. It's going to take a lot of energy. At least we know we're capable of it." She beamed.

I'd never thought about it, but martial arts had really prepared us for dance. It was natural for us to hold a dance pose for a long period of time and not ache. We did that all the time in training. You had to get past the discomfort with the energy and concentration you put into the practice. We actually had an advantage. We could win this competition. You know me, I'm all about winning.

"It does sound like fun. We'll blow them all out of the water."

Lunch couldn't come fast enough. I was starring at the clock, as I had been for the past three and a half hours. I zeroed in on the second hand. Thirty seconds. Normally, I looked forward to lunch time because, well, I love food. Today was different. Akane and I were going to meet to work on our dance. We'd come up with some really great stuff. I couldn't wait to show it off. The Tango was our dance. The quick, "snappy" (as Casper put it) movements came easy to us. It was almost like we were sparring with one another, but in a more subtle and graceful style. Almost like watching a fight in slow motion. Part of the challenge was being perfectly synchronized the entire time. Akane and I had fought off challengers to our dojo before. We had to synchronize our attacks in order to win. I'm not saying it was easy; I'm just saying we'd done it before. As I remember it, it was anything but easy. I would always lead an attack and Akane wouldn't follow right away. She'd always have a better idea…and I would never listen. In a word, it was disastrous. We'd almost lost the dojo a few times because of it. However, when we came together and accepted our responsibility to one another, we became absolutely unbeatable. This is what we had to master in order to win. We'd only get one chance to be great.

The bell rang and I darted out the door, knocking over anything and anyone in my path. I think I may have jumped over Principal Kuno's head. At least that's what Daisuke told me later.

I spied Akane, she was already sitting with Gena and her other friends. As I started to approach her, Gena and Yuka started giggling and waving about. It's funny how that type of behavior is accepted from high school girls, yet if you placed them anywhere outside of school you'd swear they escaped from a mental institution. Girls…I'll never understand them.

Strangely enough, Akane never responded in the same manner. She just smiled shyly and starred at her hands. Then she'd tell them all to shut up. Wasn't she strange? She was always one big contradiction to me. For example, today she looked particularly girly. You'd never guess she dropped guys with one punch every morning. She was wearing a pink printed dress with a white cardigan. For as tomboyish as she was, pink was definitely her color. How odd.

"Hey." I greeted her. "You ready?"

"Yeah, sure Ranma. Sorry girls, I gotta go practice."

They nodded knowingly with sinister smiles.

"You guys better keep it on the dance floor. You know, my mom knows a couple who met at a ballroom dance class. They had so much chemistry on the dance floor that they fell in love and were married." Yuka grinned.

"Yeah well…this is simply Tango." Akane explained.

"Simply one of the most passionate dances that has ever been created." Gena smirked.

She was obviously getting revenge for the other day. Something that I entirely deserved.I just smiled in their direction and winked at Akane. There was no harm in fueling their imaginations. She threatened me with her transient mallet and we left.

We couldn't really find a place to practice. The gym was occupied with basketball. There were too many people in the halls. It was too cold outside. The auditorium was off-limits. After wandering around aimlessly for ten minutes, we found a large group instruction room that was almost never in use.

"This should work. Nobody will notice this room." I said as I held the door open for her. She entered the room and dropped her sweater on the floor. I was greeted with a vision of pink spaghetti straps and pale, bare arms. She smiled when she noticed my attention.

She placed herself in her opening pose and I joined her. The pose consisted of Akane grabbing my shirt collar with her left hand and her right arm cocked back ready to slug me. Typical, right?

We moved through the dance as I caught her wrist and lightly spun her to the ground. She gracefully took to her feet. She did a series of kicks and I turned her away from me. She extended her right arm out and lunged further away from me.

"Alright Ranma, you've got to come at me." She broke me from my trance. I moved closer to her, hesitantly. "No! I'm the prey remember! Stalk me!" She shouted in irritation. Nothing makes you feel more like a creep than to have a girl beg you to stalk her. With my confidence shot to hell, I tried it again. "No! Alright, pretend we are sparring. You have to attack me. Again!" "But I never attack you…" I protested with a smile. "I just dodge your hasty, uncontrolled punches."

"Ranma! This isn't funny. It's time you man up and stalk me. Like this…" She gracefully sauntered over to me in her flowing pink dress. Her eyes were menacing and reflected some other type of emotion that I didn't even want to think about. She grabbed my hand and pulled forcefully, flinging me into her arms. She caught me and held me. That was my Akane, strong as an Ox and twice as stubborn. But did she ever wear it well. We held that pose a little too long.

"I saw them come in here!" I heard the feminine voice of the Spanish teacher.

Just then the door flung open and the suspected Spanish teacher and Principal Kuno stormed in. We leapt away from each other.

"Just as I thought. Troublemakers! A Make-out session on school property!" The Spanish teacher accused.

"Dis not fly kiddos." Principal Kuno roared as he pulled Akane out by the arm.

Then he dragged me out by my pig-tail. I really wish people would stop doing that.

He locked the door to the classroom and stormed back to his office. The Spanish teacher followed him and turned her nose up at us.

Akane and I looked at each other, stunned. We stood in silence for a couple of seconds before we turned to walk back down the hallway.

When we did move, it was obvious we were the topic of discussion. We were greeted with a hefty chorus of "ooooh" and "Whoo hoo! Ow Ow!!"

Luckily, lunch was almost over. Whatever questions we were asked in the last two minutes of lunch we ignored.

When the bell signaled that lunch was over, I grabbed Akane's hand and we made a bee-line to our next class, gym. Akane didn't even protest. She was just as anxious to get away as I was. Neither of us wasted time getting to our dressing rooms. We didn't want to hear the latest gossip, knowing that all of it would pertain to what Principal Kuno found during lunch.

Within the first two minutes of class, there was a buzz over the intercom, signaling an announcement. "Would Akane Tendo and Ranma Saotome please come to the principal's office. Thank you."

We were busted. Again with the 'ooohs' and 'whoo-hoos' and 'ow-ows'. I finished changing as quickly as possible and I darted out of the locker room, keeping my head ducked down. I didn't want to meet any skeptical stares.

Akane and I marched out of the gym and into the principal's office.

"This is what I pay for? This is what you learn in ballroom dancing?" Kuno glared at Akane and I. "Well Sir, it's only dancing. It's the Tango. Some of the dances are more…spirited than others." Akane tried to put it as gently as possible. I was sure Principal Kuno could read between the lines. "I will be meeting with this Casper Von Vasquez at practice. He will have splaining to do." Principal Kuno spat, and I was oddly reminded of an episode of I Love Lucy.

I was right, practice would prove to be interesting.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey everyone! Sorry it took me so long to update. I have been feeling a touch under the weather lately. In my defense however, this chapter is quite long compared to the others. I hope you enjoy. Keep a look out for chapter 10, it's on its way. **

**-The Divine MRS H--**

Being sent to the principal's office was not the biggest downer of my day. I could handle the taunts from my classmates. I could handle the embarrassment of being caught mid –Tango- pose by Principal Kuno and our Spanish teacher. I couldn't stand to see Akane's melancholic expression after Kuno threatened to take away ballroom club. It was so unfair. I couldn't help but feel guilty. If I was a better dancer we wouldn't have to practice during school.

Akane was getting so good too. She had more heart on that dance floor than anybody I'd ever seen. Somehow dance had become more than just something to do. For Akane it became something she completely enjoyed; you might even call it a passion.

I'd seen a lot of things, and taken a lot of crap in my life. The only thing that could unnerve me was an upset Akane.

I couldn't recall any of the lessons I'd had that day, they faded away my teacher's voice droned on. I was too busy thinking about Akane and how I could save the ballroom club. I had to get to Casper before Principal Kuno did.

When the last bell of the day sounded, I sprinted out of my class and down the hall. I was like a bullet; my course was straight all the way to the gymnasium. When I leapt inside the gym doors, I noticed that maybe I got a little carried away. I was the only one there.

'Great. Now what? Sit and wait?' I thought to myself.

My head snapped around when I heard the familiar voice of Casper. I stepped outside the gym doors only to realize that I was too late. How in the world did he beat me?

"You see dis big problem." Principal Kuno was had taken over the conversation.

"Vould you excuse me?" Casper apologetically requested.

He looked over his shoulder. Akane, Ryoga, Ukyou, Shampoo and Nabiki were walking down the hallway. Kuno was obviously hiding out. The coward. He would never be able to stand up to his own father. What a chump. I do it all the time.

When Akane and the others entered the gymnasium, Casper followed behind.

"Poopils, I must meet vith ze Prancipal. I vant you to vork on ze choreography." Casper instructed.

As soon as he left the anxiety set in. I really wanted to show off our Tango, but in front of Ukyou and Shampoo? That's like wearing a meat suit in front of a bulldog. Or in this case, two bulldogs.

"Let's dance Ranma." Akane instructed as she stepped in front of me.

"I uh…." Was all I could manage.

"Come on Ranma, what's going on?" She prodded.

"Well…um…maybe now's not the best time." I tried to explain, as I caught sight of Mouse, barely able to restrain the stewing Amazon.

"Oh…I see." Akane glared in Shampoo's direction.

"So you'd rather dance the Tango with Shampoo?" She accused.

"No…I—" I tried to explain myself yet again.

Shampoo broke free of Mouse's hold. She was now standing nose to nose with Akane.

"Of course Ranma dance Tango with Shampoo. Shampoo and Ranma have passion. Akane and Ranma is flat. Much like violent girl's chest."

And there it went, the last chance of this squabble ending without someone (probably me) leaving in an ambulance.

Akane merely frowned at that comment. Now fists went flying. No curses spat.

"It's called personal space." Akane said flatly as she moved away from Shampoo in disgust.

"Look Shampoo, Ranma is dancing the Tango with me. Now matter how you feel about it, that's the way it is. He didn't ask for my hand in marriage. He didn't even ask me out on a date. It's just dancing. If he would rather dance with you then I would let him. If you would notice for just two seconds what he actually wanted, maybe you'd see that he's never requested another partner. "Akane looked up at me expectantly.

"We've already been assigned partners Shampoo. I'm staying with Akane." I rationed.

That was Akane. She didn't need to resort to violence or name calling. She only did that where I was concerned.

Shampoo glared, not at Akane, but at me.

"This not over." She grumbled.

The gym doors flung open and Casper leapt through the doorway. "Poopils! Good news----" he paused and looked at Shampoo's battle stance. "Coo-Coo crispy girl! I ask you to vork…not air out ze hole in your head. Eef I see you bahzer zem again, it vill not be ze valk in ze pansies!"

"Eep!" Shampoo squeaked and she leapt into Mouse's arms.

"Good…use zat in ze dance." Casper critiqued as he passed them.

"Where'd Principal Kuno go?" Akane asked Casper.

"Ah…" Casper said with a smile. "Avay."

"You mean he's going to let us dance?" Akane beamed.

"I mean he vent avay." Casper smiled.

"Where did he go?" I asked, completely confused.

"Avay." Casper shrugged and turned to the stereo.

"Now ees time for ze foxtrot! Everyone take plahces. First we start with ze fellahs."

Casper began demonstrating the men's footwork.

He moved rather quickly and I could barely keep up. While he taught the girls' part, I practiced my own once. Before I knew it, Akane was standing in front of me.

"Are you ready?" She asked skeptically.

"Uh…sure." I tried to play it cool but I could tell she wasn't buying it.

"Yeah. Just don't Fox Trot all over my feet, mmmkay?"

The music began , it was some 1940s female vocalist. Typical Casper. Even though it was archaic, it was pleasant. While I was desperately trying to stay on beat, I heard Akane sing softly with the song.

_We might have been made for each other_

_To be or not to be, let our hearts discover…_

She managed to sing and stay perfectly on beat. I'd never heard her sing before and my ears had definitely been missing out. Her voice was lovely. It blended perfectly with the other vocalist.

"Foot!" The singing had stopped and Akane's nose was now wrinkled with pain (or disgust).

"Sorry…" I stammered out.

"Ranma, are you alright? You've been pretty distracted lately."

Of course I'm distracted around her. I may be as close to perfect as you can get…but I'm still a _man_. Did she not know that guys' heads follow her wherever she goes? Geez. She thinks _I'm_ dense. Buy a clue.

"I'm fine." I tried to make myself resemble that statement as much as possible. I concentrated on it so much that I began leading Akane into Shampoo and Mousse.

"Ranma!" Akane's voice protested just as realization reared its ugly head . I took smaller steps to let them get farther ahead of us.

"Nihao Ranma! You decide dance with Shampoo now? Shampoo patient but no get younger." Shampoo glared over Mousse's shoulder.

"No! She's Mine!" Mousse glanced as he spun Shampoo around.

"Shampoo we've worked so hard together, why not just finish out together? Would it be so hard to be my partner? I think we'd be good together." Mousse stammered. Little did he know he was dancing with the janitor's mop…again.

_Let's fall in Love_

_why shouldn't we fall in love?_

Shampoo forced herself in between me and Akane.

"Ranma dance with Shampoo now!" Shampoo shoved Akane out of the way.

The music snapped off and a hellish figure with a red goatee was mere centimeters away from Shampoo's face. "I tell you, you have ze partner." He gestured at Mousse. "You are excueezed from ze club until you no longer behave like Queen of ze Damned….Yankees! GEET OUT!" He bellowed. Shampoo ran out of the gym in tears. Mousse followed after her.

"Wait for me! Shampoo!"

Ukyou and Ryoga blushed and looked down at the floor. Kuno and Nabiki smiled innocently. Gena and Daisuke were utterly confused.

"Are zere any more conflictions?" Casper asked menacingly.

Everyone shook their head.

"Good, dance now."

Casper spun on his heel toward the stereo.

"We change up tempo." He instructed as he changed the song. He was right about that. This song was slow and…intimidating.

I clumsily lead Akane to the slower Foxtrot tempo. As soon as I heard the slinky sax solo and brass choir I knew this would end in tragedy.

_If you want a lover_

_I'll do anything you ask me to_

_And if you want another kind of love_

_I'll wear a mask for you_

_If you want a partner, take my hand_

_Or if you want to strike me down in anger_

_Here I stand_

_I'm your man…_

I stopped dancing immediately.

'Could I continue dancing with Akane to this?'

I was beginning to feel mighty uncomfortable.

"Ranma!" She hissed. I reluctantly turned my face to hers. My cheeks were burning.

"Huh?" I mumbled.

"MOVE!" she commanded as she pointed to the ever-nearing couples.

"Ahaha…" I took that to mean she was ok with the dance.

_If you want a boxer_

_I will step into the ring for you_

_And if you want a doctor_

_I'll examine every inch of you_

_If you want a driver, climb inside_

_Or if you want to take me for a ride_

_You know you can_

_I'm your man…_

I lead Akane into a slow and graceful turn. She seemed to be enjoying herself. Why was I so uptight? Could I have been anymore spastic? I tripped.

_Ah, the moon's too bright_

_The chain's too tight_

_The beast won't go to sleep_

_I've been running through these promises to you_

_That I made and I could not keep_

_Ah but a man never got a woman back_

_Not by begging on his knees_

_Or I'd crawl to you baby_

_And I'd fall at your feet_

_And I'd howl at your beauty_

_Like a dog in heat_

_And I'd claw at your heart_

_And I'd tear at your sheet_

_I'd say please, please_

_I'm your man…_

I stole another glance at Akane. She was blushing furiously. We continued to dance in complete silence. We didn't risk stealing glances at each other. For a few minutes, it seemed like we were perfect strangers dancing with each other; except for the minor fact that my heart was pounding like a kettle drum.

I lead her into a series of turns and I dipped her on the last one. I could feel holes burning into my skull.

_And if you've got to sleep_

_A moment on the road_

_I will steer for you_

_And if you want to work the street alone_

_I'll disappear for you_

_If you want a father for your child_

_Or only want to walk with me a while_

_Across the sand_

_I'm your man…_

_Ah, the moon's too bright_

_The chain's too tight_

_The beast won't go to sleep_

_I've been running through these promises to you_

_That I made and I could not keep_

She turned her back to me and I held on to both of her hands. She slipped out of my grasp and I fell to the floor. It may have looked like part of the dance, but I assure you it was an accident.

_Ah but a man never got a woman back_

_Not by begging on his knees_

_Or I'd crawl to you baby_

_And I'd fall at your feet_

_And I'd howl at your beauty_

_Like a dog in heat_

_And I'd claw at your heart_

_And I'd tear at your sheet_

_I'd say please, please_

I turned her away from me and pulled her back with force. She clung to me tightly.

_I'm your man…_

She was so close to me, without protest, smirk or sneer. My knees began to get shaky and I had no feeling in my face. My legs and arms felt a prickle, like pine needles.

The music eventually faded out and Akane shrugged out of my hold. She looked at me with vague curiosity and I'm sure I looked positively green…or red…either way, it was humiliating

"Ah, very elegante Pig-tail. Good work." Casper beamed.

Ok, definitely red.

Akane blushed slightly too and looked down at the floor.

Casper put on some Elvis records and commenced with teaching us the Jive. I had to say that all the couples were catching on rather well. I had thought this dance would be a piece of cake to dominate. I was sadly mistaken. While it was true, we had a slight advantage being martial artists; I had underestimated Ryoga's ability. He and Ukyou really seemed to outshine everybody on this dance. He also had the same advantage…and then some. His rhythm and interpretation of the music was unattainable. But that didn't stop me from trying. There was no way I was going to let Ryoga beat me at anything…even if that meant sissy frou-frou ballroom dancing.

I tried to kick my leg higher than his, and kicked myself in the head. Don't ask me how that happened; that little stunt also caused me to pull muscles in places…that you don't even want to think about.

I tried to stand taller than him while presenting Akane in a window hold. I ended up injuring Akane's shoulder.

I tried to flex my arms more to make my arms look longer than his on poses. I ended up elbowing Ryoga in the eye. He promptly returned the favor.

I assume Akane had enough when she said I needed to grow up and get over myself. She also told me that if my focus was going to be on Ryoga, then I should turn myself into a girl and dance with him instead. She could be utterly ridiculous sometimes.

Casper ripped me apart. He said I would be shown up by a pirouetting Sasquatch any day of the week. At least that's what it sounded like.

We concluded this lesson with Casper's surprise. We were all dying to know what it would be.

"But first," Casper instructed, "a demonstration."

Gena and Daisuke came to the center of the gym floor. Somewhere in the time I'd been squabbling with Ryoga, Gena and Daisuke had left and changed their clothes. Here they were, standing like a professional ballroom dancing couple. Gena was wearing a sparkly pale blue dress…which was rather revealing. I glanced at Akane and she was watching me like a hawk. Daisuke was wearing a black satin shirt with a wide collar and black pants.

Casper started the music and the couple moved across the floor, soft and smooth like flowing water. Daisuke took Gena into his arms and turned her sharply. He put his hands on her hips and she moved them from side to side. They then put their hands together and lifted them over their heads then, gracefully, they let them fall behind each other's head. They did a series of slow, sustained footwork, and extended arms. Following that, they did slower, more graceful turns. In this dance, the couple looked each other, face to face.

Quickly, Daisuke grabbed one of her hands and spun her away from him. She spun rapidly across the gym floor. Then she ran to him and turned several times in his direction. The last turn ended with her hooking her leg around Daisuke's and they both lunged. I recognized that move from some Tangos. Daisuke then dipped her to the audience and passionately pulled her against himself.

Daisuke and Gena bowed. "This is all we have so far…" Gena announced apologetically.

"Wow…That was beautiful." Akane was the first to speak.

"Akane Tendo, you must partner with me for that magnificent dance." Kuno announced. I'd never noticed that he'd come out of his hiding place. I suppose my mind had been on other things. Now my mind was focused on doing a magnificent dance on his face.

"Not in your dreams; and certainly not even in my nightmares." Akane responded.

Nabiki just shook her head. "Kuno baby, if you want to rumba…all you have to do is ask."

"Akane Tendo, will you be my partner in the dance of love?" Kuno blathered.

"I meant _me_…ask _me_. You're hopeless." Nabiki fumed.

"Poopils, I hope you enjoy show. Don't geet too comfzy. One pair vill be doing zis next veek."

Everyone groaned in almost perfect unison.

"Vell, zat vas NOT ze zurprize!" Casper announced.

He ran out of the gym and instantly returned with rolling racks with what appeared to be clothing…of the sparkly nature.

"You choose vat to vear for pahrfarmances. Zey are RENTAL only. You tear clothes…I tear heart. Ees good? Ok…go Poopils."

Ukyou and Akane squealed with joy as they ran over to the racks to choose their dresses.

Ryoga and I just looked at each other and groaned. Wow. What a great surprise…spandex and glitter. That's totally worth breaking myself over.


	10. Chapter 10

Akane stepped out of the ladies' lockeroom, a vision in lavender and lace.

"Well? How do I look?" She asked me.

This is one of those questions that men fear. She looked so beautiful. I knew there was no possible way I could describe her justly. She was so captivating that I couldn't remember what language I spoke.

"Ranma!" There was that pesky irritation again.

"Uh….er….you look alright Akane." I mumbled. That was me, smooth like tree bark.

I remembered how I used to tell her that the only thing she looked good in was her gi. I wanted to tell her exactly how wrong I was. For some reason I couldn't feel my tongue.

I gather that Akane knew what I meant. She smiled shyly and shook her head in frustration.

"So are you going to show me your Waltz wear?" Akane grinned.

"Nah…it's just a monkey suit." I rolled my eyes.

"What about for Tango?" She pressed.

My eyes bugged in humiliation. I gestured at the clingy black pants on a hanger and a red satin shirt with a plunging neckline. Akane roared hysterically.

"NOT humorous." I growled.

"Just wait, I have one more." She instructed as she bounced back into the locker room.

"Alright…" I muttered. I was pretending to be bored. In reality, I didn't mind looking at Akane one bit.

The locker room door flew open, and it wasn't Akane who strode out. It was Ukyou. She was wearing a dark blue sparkly dress. She was instantly at my side.

"What do you think Ran-chan?"

"Uh…it's nice." I responded, obviously uninterested.

"Really? I picked it out because I knew it would match your eyes!" _Ukyou offered. _

"Uh….that's great and all…but you're dancing with Ryoga."

"Oh pish…you know he wants to dance with Akane."

"Well that's too bad because I am." I informed her.

At that moment Ryoga bounded back into the gym. He was obviously trying on the outfit for his choreography project. His shirt was far too tight…and midly disgusting. It was black and see-through. Almost like mesh. But the girlishness didn't stop there; it was also covered in a glittery pattern.

"Ranma!" He bellowed.

"You can't hog Ukyou and Akane all to yourself." He challenged me by raising his fist.

"I'm not, for Pete's sake! Just Akane…"

"Oh so you admit it then? You want her for yourself?" Ryoga pushed.

"Cripes! I'm just dancing with her. Would you two put a sock in it?" I glared at Ukyou and Ryoga.

Ukyou looked down at the floor.

"I'm sorry Ran-Chan. I only wanted your approval. If you want to dance with Akane, well then I guess that's your choice."

Ukyou headed for the dressing room.

"You've brought this on yourself Saotome." Ryoga glared at me and turned to walk away.

"It's ok, I'll go easy on you." I waved him off.

"What? Why on **Earth** would you do **that**?" He called back, offended.

"I'd say you've punished yourself enough with that shirt. Yikes."

Ryoga glared daggers of death.

About this time, Casper came sprinting after Ryoga.

"My precious poopsie! I thought I lose you!" he bellowed.

"Gah!" Ryoga sprinted toward me. "What is **WRONG** with you?" Ryoga yelled.

Casper lunged at Ryoga's knee caps and knocked him to the ground.

"You stole my shat." Casper accused.

"Your…Shi..?" Ryoga began. I glared at him.

"You stole his shirt Ryoga. Give it back."

"Oh…." Ryoga laughed nervously.

"Thees ees from my private collection. No touch!"

"Yes Sir…" Ryoga left for the mens' locker room to change.

Nabiki strode out of the Womens' locker room. She came out wearing what she went in wearing, a pair of old sweats.

"You aren't going to pick something out?" I asked, curious.

"Oh, I already have." She gestured to the lump of green cloth slung over her left arm and the lump of gold cloth slung over her right.

"I'm not going to model them for you, if that's what you're implying." Nabiki scolded.

"That's quite alright----" I began.

"WHAT?" roared a voice from inside the locker room.

A half naked Akane stormed out of the locker room. That's how I'd put it.

She was wearing a red and black lace…dress? I guess that's what she'd call it. The "dress" had two slits all the way up the sides. Her legs and all their glory were there for the world to see.

"Why were you trying to get Nabiki to show you her dresses?" Akane asked sternly.

"I wasn't. She misunderstood what I had asked her." I explained.

I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't look away from Akane. I knew I had no right to stare at her like that but I just couldn't help it. That infuriated me more. If this outfit had that effect on me, there was no way in hell I'd let Ryoga or any other guy see it.

Akane caught me staring at her.

"What do you think?" Akane asked as she posed.

"Uh…I think not."

"What? Why not?" Akane frowned.

"Too revealing."

"What? What are you, my father?"

"I can't believe you actually want to parade around in that!"

"Oh…so you wouldn't mind if say, Shampoo or Ukyou paraded around in it."

"I wouldn't care what they did."

"What? You have some nerve! You don't think I should parade around in it because I'm too much of a tomboy and I've got no figure." She glared at me, her face flushing from anger.

"I didn't say that…"

"You say it all the time!" She had a point there. I knew teasing her would catch up with me somehow.

"You should see what Ukyou's wearing for the choreography project. Her outfit makes this one look matronly!" Akane fumed.

"Akane, I don't ever want to think of anyone's mother wearing _that_"

"Fine. I'll go take it off." Akane turned around stormed off toward the locker room.

"I Just don't want anyone else to look at you…" I blurted out. "Not like that."

She stopped. She turned around. Confusion swept her face.

"What do you mean…like that?" 

She really had no clue how gorgeous she was. Though frustrating as hell, it was pretty cute.

"Never mind." I said with a smile. "You should wear whatever you want."

I saw a faint smile lighten up her face. That didn't mean I was going to abandon my post pummeling any guy who stared at her.

Gena shyly stepped out of the locker room. Soon after, Daisuke found his way back into the gym. He was still wearing his rumba outfit. She was wearing a white and green waltz dress.

"Oh wow Gena, You look beautiful!" Akane gushed.

"Yes, I would say that color works well with your strawberry hair." Nabiki complimented.

Gena blushed and smiled.

She took a few steps toward Daisuke. She looked down at the floor.

"What do you think, Daisuke?"

"I think…you're beautiful." He said profoundly and unashamedly.

Why couldn't I say that? Geez. It was simple. It was four measly words. I really was a pathetic mess of misfortune.

Then again…the night…er…afternoon…was still young.

Gena and Daisuke walked us home after practice. They had obviously been getting a long well. I absently listened to Gena and Akane chortle. Daisuke seemed to be hanging on Gena's every word.

"What do you think Ranma?" Daisuke asked me.

"Uh….about what?" I answered nonchalantly.

"A double date tonight? Gena and Me, you and Akane." He shook his head irritably.

"A What?" I looked over at Akane. She seemed to be just as curious to know my answer as Gena and Daisuke.

"What did you tell them Akane?" I thought maybe this would be a good time to pass the buck.

"Well, they suggested going to a dance club. I think it could be fun. It'd be a nice way to practice." Akane rationed.

Well I guess that said it all. Now, I don't mind dancing with Akane. In fact, I quite enjoy it. However, public humiliation is an entirely different thing. I wasn't even good enough to show off for the ballroom club yet. How could I ever go out dancing? The only dance I'd come close to mastering was the Tango. That was still pretty rough and besides, what kind of dance club plays music you can Tango to? This was going to be tragic.

"Well I'd really rather not make a fool of myself…" I explained.

Akane frowned.

"Of course he'd look like a fool dancing with me."

Gena turned to Daisuke, expecting him to say something on to prod me.

"It's not that. I'm just not a dancer…this was _your _thing." I tried to explain.

"Yeah, I get it." Akane scoffed.

She had such an adorable little pout. You couldn't help but love her when she was mad.

"Ok fine, I'll go with you…but don't expect me to dance."

She brightened a bit at this.

"You have to dance at least once with me." She wagered.

"Damn you drive a hard bargain. But sorry, I gave the terms."

"Alright, have it your way. I'll just have to get some strange man to dance with me." Akane jabbed.

The jealousy card had been pulled and she knew I had lost. There was no way I'd ever let another man lay a hand on her.

"You're bluffing." I shrugged nonchalantly.

"Oh you just wait." She promised.

We stopped at Gena 's house. We waved our good-byes to the pair and continued our walk home. I peered over at Akane. She had the faintest blush in her cheeks and I couldn't help but wonder what she could be thinking about. My mind mulled over the possibilities.

Neither one of us had any idea of what was in store for us once we got home.

"Akane! Son! You've made me so happy! It truly is a blessed day!" Soun announced as we entered the Tendo household.

"Really? What's up now?" I asked casually.

"I'm so happy that you two are…_preparing._" He answered firmly.

"Preparing…for what Dad?" Akane asked.

Why did she have to ask? We both were well aware that our parents would marry us off for the silliest reasons. Whatever Soun had up his sleeve most certainly was grounded in us in holy matrimony. Why concern ourselves with the why and how? I personally chose not to humor them.

"For your first dance as husband and wife! Providing you two decide to have a westernized ceremony. But why fret about details now? I am just elated that you've embraced your engagement…"

Soun had a lot more to say. The trouble was, no one could understand him with his raggedy sobs and hysterics.

"Oh geez…" I rolled my eyes. "I knew it'd be something."

"Daddy…did you find out about ballroom club?" Akane asked hesitantly.

Soun nodded his head. "Of course, I know everything."

He gave a sharp glare to me and then smiled sweetly back at his daughter.

"Whatever. Who blabbed? That darn Nabiki!" Akane fumed.

"Akane…you're wrong. It wasn't Nabiki this time." Soun frowned in disappointment.

"You can't blame everything on her young lady. You can sure blame a lot of things…but not everything!"

Akane paused. We were both utterly confused. She was the only one sneaky and under-handed enough to blab. She was the only one with something to gain…though we could never really be sure what her motivation was.

"Kasumi informed me of your extra-curricular activities…but like I said, I am thrilled that you two have taken such a formal step."

Soun slapped me on the back and I cringed.

"First of all, I can't believe I've been ratted out by Kasumi. I never saw that one coming. Second of all, Dad…you have a very active imagination. That's great and all…but maybe you should put it to good use. For example, you could be using that creative streak to figure out ways to get new students to enroll at the dojo. That seems like a more pressing matter than marrying off your teenaged, dependent and ill-prepared daughter. Honestly!" Akane fumed and she stalked off to her room.

I watched her leave. I swore to myself that she was the most intriguing tomboy that had ever existed.

"Well now Ranma…" Soun began as he put his arm around me once more. This time it was in a more bone-crushing, death grip manner.

"It's just dancing." I headed him off before he could start on me.

"It would seem that your youth has blinded you, Boy!"

"I uh…eh…" I lost the ability to form sentences as Soun's eyes bugged in a peculiar manner. I thought I saw smoke pour out of his ears.

"That's excusable to a point. However, there must come a time when a boy becomes a man. Do you know what I'm saying Son?" His stare was cold and calculated.

"Uh…yes? I'm not sure I like where this is---"

"It's time to face your destiny! What do you say, Boy?" Soun announced with grandeur.

"Uh…yes?" I helplessly agreed.

Soun laughed eccentrically.

"Great! I knew you'd understand with the advice of a wise and educated counselor. "

Soun's eyes beamed with pride.

I turned to leave the room, very concerned for my well-being. Man was he creepy sometimes.

"One more thing Ranma…" his voice was threatening.

"Uh…Sir?" I addressed.

"Remember…That's my little girl up there. You dare not hurt my little girl."

His voice was low, an intense murmur which made his threat all the more frightening.

"Y-yes Sir!" I called over my shoulder as I ran for my room. I could hear Soun's eccentric laughter ringing in my ears. And then I promptly wet myself. Hmm…it runs in the family.

"Hey Akane! Gena and Daisuke are here! Are you comin' or what?" I called up the stairs after her.

"I'll be down in just a minute, Ranma!" she called back.

Gena and Daisuke had been waiting for 10 minutes already. They were getting pretty anxious and I was getting pretty frustrated. I could do without all of this anticipation. Why must she always keep me waiting?

I smoothed out my shirt. I was uncharacteristically dressed. I wore a simple black buttoned down shirt and khaki pants. It was something that Akane figured I'd never own. Really, I didn't own it until five this evening, when I desperately needed Nabiki's help. She helped me pick something out. With a fee of course.

Though it wasn't my choice or style, I happen to think that Nabiki did rather well. One thing was for certain; Akane would definitely be considering herself one lucky girl after she saw me.

A pair of shapely legs and stiletto heels appeared at the top of the stair case. As she made her way down them, I couldn't help but stare at the vision in the tight yellow-gold mini dress approaching me. I'm sure my jaw had put a hole in the floor by now.

"Are we all ready to go?" She asked enthusiastically. She smiled at Gena and Daisuke.

'Go? Wait…why were Gena and Daisuke here? Oh yeah…the double date.'

Suddently I felt self-conscious about being seen with Akane. I began to feel I was underdressed and far too shabby to be in her radiant presence.

She smiled at me and took my arm. I began to sweat profusely.

"Sorry I kept you waiting…" she murmured softly.

"It's ok…" I stammered out. "It was well worth it."


	11. Chapter 11

The gold figure illuminating under the sparkling sky was more than captivating. I couldn't help but stare at her. When did she look so much like a woman?

"You look nice, Ranma." Akane smiled at me. I'd been caught.

"Uh…heh…well Nabiki helped me out." I twitched nervously.

"Really?" Akane giggled. "She actually helped me out too. Isn't it nice when she offers to do kind things for free?"

Free? I guess I missed that part of the deal. I was too busy racking up a shopping bill and treating her royal highness to an ice cream sundae.

I just smiled and nodded.

"You look nice too, Akane." I casually complimented her.

She smiled at this and turned her attention to Gena and Daisuke.

"So where are we going?" she asked with interest.

Daisuke scratched the back of his head in a state of confusion.

"Uh well, it's this place some friends of mine at St. Heberke's recommended. It's a jazz club, and you're welcome to dance there." Gena answered.

"Oh…what's the name of the place?" She asked curiously.

"Jonny's." Gena smiled.

Akane and I traded curious glances. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Never heard of that place before…" Akane admitted.

"Oh, well…it should be just up ahead."

I inched myself closer to Akane as we walked. I noticed that Gena and Daisuke were holding hands. I reached for Akane's. She didn't seem to mind. I was surprised by how much smaller her hand was than mine. I smiled when our fingers hooked together like puzzle pieces.

(3 hours later)

"Ok, are you sure you know where this place is?" I asked skeptically.

"Hey, if Gena said she knew where it was, we'll get there." Daisuke defended.

"Hon, it's getting late….or rather…early…where is it?" Daisuke whispered impatiently.

"We uh…must have passed it several blocks back. I wasn't really paying attention." Gena shyly admitted.

"Great." My sarcastic side was livelier than ever.

There was muffled music coming through one of the buildings.

"Guys, I hate to put you out… but I really need a restroom." Akane announced.

We stopped walking.

"Akane, if we're going to make it in time, you're going to have to hold it." I instructed.

"I _have_ been…and now _**you're**_ going to have to hold it." Akane hissed.

Gena and Daisuke watched tentatively; neither one daring to but in.

"For cryin' in the sink 'kane! Can't you suck it up? We're almost there."

I was cranky. I didn't ask to go on this date; I didn't ask to wear uncomfortable clothes; I didn't ask to shell out an unseemly lump of cash to make this happen, but I did it without complaint…for _**her**_. And damn it all, we were going to get to the club before it closed!

"Ranma! You can be such a jerk sometimes. Honestly!" She paused and turned to Gena and Daisuke.

"I'm sorry guys; you can go on ahead without me."

"No that's ok Akane, we'll wait for you." Daisuke confirmed and Gena nodded.

Akane hurried inside the large, heavy doors of the building. There was an instant blaring of the previously muffled music. Country music. Egh.

Gena, Daisuke and I followed her in to what I would soon find to be the seventh circle of hell.

The country music was loud and twangy. There were cowboy hats as far as the eye could see. I spotted a woman with a mullet serving up beer to a man with a 'You Might Be a Redneck …' t-shirt. Where the hell was I? And why was there a place like this in Nerima?

In the middle of the room was a large group of people dancing in some sort of line formation. Gena spied the dancing and squealed. "Ooh! Doesn't that look like fun? I know how to line dance, I was born in Texas after all." "Sure hon…" Daisuke answered, slightly petrified.

Akane came out of the Ladies' room and observed the dancing in the middle of the room.

"Hey guys…what's going on?" She asked puzzled.

"It's line dancing. It's really fun…d'ya wanna try?" Gena grinned.

"Um…ok? I don't really know how…" Akane admitted sheepishly.

"That's ok…I can teach you!" Gena offered.

"Ok…" Akane hesitantly replied.

"YAY!" Gena shouted enthusiastically.

"_**C'mon**_ Daisuke…" Gena prodded him.

His eyes were pleading me to do something. I just stood, too dumbfounded to react.

"Ranma, are you coming?" Akane politely requested.

"I _**don't**_ think so." I replied firmly. Disgusting.

"Yeah, that's typical. Well don't forget my promise." Akane smirked.

I made a show of looking at the men in the room and I rolled my eyes at her.

"Knock yourself out."

I leaned against a post and watched as Gena tried to teach Akane and Daisuke how to line dance. It was pretty comical. Daisuke looked like a constipated dog dancing out there. Akane wasn't much better. She moved too slowly and a man from behind trampled over her. She took it in stride until the fifth or sixth time.

"Hey you dimwitted clod, I'm dancing here!" she shouted.

The man behind her just laughed.

When the song was over, all three of them headed off the dance floor and over to where I was standing.

"Now didn't that look fun, Ranma?" Gena prodded.

"Not as fun as eating staples…or licking dirt." I sharply replied.

"I can arrange that." Akane threatened. And she could. Her cooking was usually quite similar.

I chose to keep that comment to myself.

"Oh come off it, Grandpa. Would it kill you to lighten up once in awhile?" Akane glared at me. Apparently she didn't appreciate my witty sarcasm.

"Sure I can. I'd rather it be in a place where men didn't bare midriffs." I quipped.

"Oh please, they're harmless. Besides, you shake your stuff in front of Casper all the time." Akane interjected.

"That's different!" I argued. "And I do not _**shake**_ anything." The nerve.

About this time, a burly man in a black cowboy hat strode up to Akane. It was the man who trampled all over her earlier.

"Hey, you gonna save me a dance?" He asked with a smile.

Akane giggled. She looked over at me and winked.

The man looked at me too.

"Didn't mean to be impolite. My name's Jin." He announced.

"I'm Akane…and that's Ranma." Akane gestured to me.

The man nodded slowly and turned his attention back to me.

"Have you laid claim on this pretty lady?" He asked cautiously.

Was he for real? Who talks like that? Laid claim? Somebody should lay claim on some brain cells.

"No, I don't have a _**claim**_ on her…Neanderthal." I grumbled.

The man ignored me and turned his attention to Akane.

"Well…how 'bout it?" he asked again.

"Well…ok. I'll give you a chance to redeem yourself. Maybe then I'll forgive you for the bruises on my feet." Akane grinned and took his arm. Over her shoulder she stuck her tongue out at me.

I watched them saunter off as a chorus of "Boot Scootin' Boogie" droned on.

_Get down, turn around, go to town… boot scootin' boogie…._

As they danced, Jin took off his black cowboy hat and put it on Akane's head. She laughed and posed with it. Egh. Didn't she believe in head lice? This was a perfect destruction of my once glorious evening. Now all I needed was a herd of fiancés to fall through the roof.

Somebody malicious had apparently read my thoughts. However, it wasn't a herd…and they didn't fall from the sky. They used the front door.

"Nihao!" shouted a high pitched voice. In bounded a mass of purple hair, a quacking duck, and a giant spatula. Of course Ukyou was standing behind it.

I laughed nervously and my whole body began to twitch. Something truly evil was about to happen.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded icily.

"I bring Ranma dinner and Ranma not home. I pay greedy girl. She spill beans." Shampoo shrugged.

"Yeah, and I was on my way to come see you and I found this purple-haired hussy sniffing around your place. I followed her. How was I to know we'd drag our sorry butts into every club, tavern and pool hall in Nerima?" She glared at me as though I was her wayward husband.

The duck quacked loudly and launched himself at my leg. I plucked him off.

"Didja happen to see a place called Jonny's?" I asked in irritation.

"Yes…why you ask?" Shampoo looked at me curiously.

"No reason…" I flatly answered. I couldn't think of a decent explanation that wouldn't end with me escorting her there.

"Oh Sugar, why are you in a place like _**this**_?" Ukyou asked in disgust.

A large man in a trucker hat belched loudly behind her as he passed. She growled in irritation, then a flying peanut shell struck her forehead.

"This place suck!" Shampoo agreed.

"Oh _**there's**_ the reason." Ukyou groaned as she spied Akane dancing with Jin.

"She dumped you. It's time you rebound." Ukyou offered. I began to sweat. If it hasn't been made apparent to you already, I'm not one for conflict.

"Nah. She's only dancing with that gorilla because I wouldn't dance. She's just tryin' to make me jeal---"

"Oh Ranma honey! You turned her down because you'd rather dance with a _**real**_ woman. Right?" Ukyou's eyes were threatening.

I sidestepped the question. "I'd prefer not to dance here." I simply stated. Though the thought of doing anything that remotely resembled dancing in an establishment like this was enough to make my skin crawl.

My request apparently fell on deaf ears.

"Ranma no dance with Spatula Girl. Ranma dance with Shampoo!" Shampoo hissed.

"Now wait just a minute. I asked Ranma first. He's going to dance with _**me**_!" Ukyou roared and she swung her spatula high over head.

The production was loud enough to drown out the music. Akane noticed the argument. She glared in my direction but said nothing. That was good; she didn't have any room to talk anyway.

In the midst of this heated argument, Ryoga stormed into the building.

"Ranma Saotome! You cad! I don't know what you've done…but you better not do it anymore!"

He tried to sound as threatening as possible. He just can't pull it off.

"What now?" I asked, mostly for posterity's sake. I was more surprised that it had taken him so long to follow the girls than I was by his being there.

"I was training rigorously in the wilderness when I saw these two run past." His eyes narrowed. "And it's a good thing I did! I knew there'd be trouble. Look at you…philandering in an establishment like this. You've let that ogre attack poor Akane!"

"First of all, I'm not philandering….and Akane chose to dance with that imbecile." I retorted.

"Secondly, be honest…you were camping out in the park again, weren't you?"

"How dare you belittle the grueling hardships? It was hell! I was attacked by filthy feathered demons! They stole my food. Then this man proclaiming to be a great medieval wizard stole my backpack. He said he needed it to appease a pagan god! I came here with nothing but the clothes on my back!" Ryoga cried valiantly.

"Oh for Pete's sake! That's crazy Ol' Man Hal. He threw your backpack at the cement truck again, didn't he?" Ryoga loved to exaggerate. I loved to knock the wind out of his sail.

"Ranma! When we fight again, you'll see what I've mastered!" He laughed maniacally.

"Ryoga…hon…did the park squirrels nest in your head?" Ukyou jabbed.

Ryoga blushed. He glared at me and I knew there'd be a fight before the night was over.

The song ended and Jin thanked Akane for the dance. She smiled and nodded. She strode over to where we were standing. Gena and Daisuke joined her.

"Well, now that we're all here…should we try to find Jonny's?" She eyed Shampoo and Ukyou skeptically. She almost stepped on poor Mousse.

We were all but ready to leave, when a fast-paced song sounded through the speakers.

"Ooh! I love this song!" Gena announced.

"You can Jive to it!"

She began pulling Daisuke by the arm in the direction of the dance floor. "Just one more dance…" she pleaded. There it went…all hope of redeeming this night.

"Jive? What do you say Akane?" Ryoga asked shyly.

"Sure!" She winked at me again.

"Great! You're coming with me Ranma Honey." Ukyou grabbed me by the arm and started to drag me. She didn't get far before Shampoo grabbed the other one.

'_Hung my cotton dress on rusted wire  
Up there on Pilahatchee Bridge  
Just a crazy roughneck's daughter  
Jumped head-first into the water  
Baptized away my sins_

_Hitched to town with Bobby Jo and Tommy  
Couple of lookers, new best friends  
We slipped in the back of Sunday service  
Know them church ladies, they heard us  
Bum smoke money from the offering_

_Mama said, "Idle hands are Devil's handywork"  
Oh, the trouble you'll get into  
You got nothin' better to do, got nothin' better to do  
You got nothin' better to do, got nothin' better to do…_


	12. Chapter 12

Sorry that I haven't updated in awhile. I am so glad that you're all enjoying this story. That really encourages me to keep writing. Just so you know, this chapter ended up being really long so I split it into two. I will be posting the second part tomorrow. (Unfortunately, that is the part that contains Casper…so you'll have to wait a little longer for him to resurface again.)

Thanks again for all your support!

-TheDivineMrsH-

The rest of the evening passed on in painful procession. Shampoo and Ukyou continued to argue over me. I quickly noticed that the argument had little to do with me. I managed to slip away for a few moments in the heat of it.

I observed Akane and Ryoga for a bit. They laughed and danced the night away like they were the oldest of friends…possibly more. She sure put on a good show. I refused to believe that Ryoga could best me at anything, especially where Akane was concerned. She noticed my attention…and she wasn't too pleased when she saw Shampoo and Ukyou going back and forth like squabbling hens. In her eyes, I could see that she expected something of me. I just looked on in a daze. What did she want from me? Apparently, I didn't give her the satisfaction she'd been searching for. Her stare turned flat and cold. She turned her attention back to Ryoga and continued to ignore me for the rest of the evening.

Mousse had gone missing, and the person who had the most reason to be concerned never noticed his disappearance. She was too busy threatening Ukyou.

A man named Seiki stumbled out of the mens' room. In his drunken stupor, he claimed that he'd seen a duck turn into a man by bathing in the restroom sink. Most of the patrons ignored Seiki's comments, claiming that he was talking nonsense and that he'd had enough libations for the evening. Mousse cautiously exited the restroom and Seiki caught him by the arm. He demanded that everyone watch closely. He then asked Mousse to transform himself back into a duck. Mousse declined politely. He explained to everyone that this gentleman had seen enough fun for one evening. Seiki wouldn't let it go.

"Hey! That's enough…leave the gentleman alone. You've had your fun, let it go." I instructed. He ignored my advice. And it almost cost him dearly.

Seiki grabbed a glass of water off a table and attempted to throw it at Mousse. Mousse briskly dodged the water, and just as briskly, cornered Seiki.

"I'll accept that as a challenge!" Mousse shouted bravely. He twisted the arm of the man named Seiki, until he cried out in pain.

"Mousse! What are you doing?" Akane protested.

"Silly Mousse! Why you start trouble?" Shampoo demanded.

"I must protect my honor…it's all I have!" Mousse cried bravely.

"What honor? You beat by girl." Shampoo argued.

Mousse faltered a bit at that comment, he unintentionally loosened his grip on Seiki. Seiki seized the opportunity and broke free from Mousse's hold.

"I will not be defeated again. Not by this lowly braggart." Mousse shouted as he prepared to launch himself at Seiki.

"WHAT is going on in MY bar?" Jin bellowed.

All eyes fell on him. Not a whisper was heard. So now it was clear, Jin was the owner of this place. Hmm…I guess that makes perfect sense. Business reflects the owner.

Jin commenced to throwing us all out on our ears. He kept repeating that he didn't allow riff-raff in his bar. Seriously, are you kidding? What types of patrons did he think he had? Barons? Dutchesses? I supposed I missed the noble qualities in the gentleman running the 'pull my finger' gag into the ground.

Did I say all of us were thrown out on our ears? I meant to say that all of us except Akane were thrown out on our ears. Jin made it perfectly clear that he wished Akane to stay. Akane turned him down (surprisingly) and followed the "riff-raff" out into the street.

Then the arguing commenced.

"Stupid Mousse! This all your fault!" Shampoo accused. "You ruin evening with Ranma!"

"But Shampoo…you know I had to defend my honor. I don't want you to think I'm weak." Mousse defended.

"So you rather Shampoo be out on street?" She glared.

"Shampoo that was not my intention…."

"Way to go Ranma!" Akane's patronizing voice was behind me.

"What?!" I protested. "Just how in the world is this my fault?"

Akane shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"I hate to get in the middle of this, but Akane has a point." Daisuke added as he took Gena's hand.

"How's that?" I asked in irritation.

"Well, they're your friends. Why didn't you just ask them to leave? Why'd you bring them anyway?"

"I didn't bring them! They followed me!" I defended.

"Oh…I see." Sniffed Ukyou. "If you don't want me around just say so."

"No it's not that; you're great Ukyou…it's just…."

"Ranma no want Shampoo." Shampoo's angry eyes were now focused on me.

I began to sweat. Man girls were really good at plying the pressure. How could I possibly have gotten out of this unscathed? This was a delicate matter. It wasn't really the time to be blunt. I couldn't come out and say "You weren't invited." or "Go away."or "You're way too pushy and it annoys me." That would upset them. And when you upset them they cry. And crying women just happen to be a weakness of mine. Yes, when you boil Ranma Saotome's ego away, he's a squishy puddle of goo.

Besides, Ukyou was such a great friend…and Shampoo…well…she'd always been nice to me. I couldn't rationalize anymore. I threw everything to pot and went for the blurted what came to mind.

"Well, I didn't ask for this, not any of it." I admitted, and it felt good to finally get it off my chest---that is until I saw Akane's sad expression.

"Akane," I began, "I don't mean…"

"Save it Ranma. I'd apologize for ruining your evening, but seeing as you've ruined mine I think it's best to call it even." She walked past me and caught up with Ryoga.

Ryoga turned to me with a smirk.

"I'll be escorting Miss Akane home now." Ryoga's smirk widened to a grin as she took his arm. I was right; the night hadn't ended without a fight, and clearly he had won…for now. Yes, as pathetic as it might seem, I still refused to throw in the towel. In fact, I was quite convinced at that moment that I never would where Akane was concerned.

There was always tomorrow…and there was always the Tango. Slowly but surely, dancing had opened new doors for us, that we never would have dared to look in to otherwise. I took solace in that. A Cheshire grin crept across my face. Ryoga didn't miss it and I could see the assurance leak out of his eyes. He had seen what I had seen. No matter how many times Akane and I fought, she was already taken. The trouble was, she just didn't know it yet.

When I finally made it home, (after my great escape from Ukyou and Shampoo---yeah that one took some skill) Akane had already gone to bed. I discovered that when I was confronted by Mr. Tendo and my dad as soon as my big toe grazed the threshold.

"What are you _doing_ boy?" Mr. Tendo demanded. "It was the first date with my daughter and you've already upset her! First impressions mean everything! Maybe you're not the man we hoped you'd become." He looked at my dad expectantly.

"But Sir, Akane and I have been living under the same roof for two years. We've had our fleeting first impressions long ago." I interjected. Something about this statement displeased him. He glared at my dad again.

"Yes I quite agree with you Tendo. I didn't raise my son to be a ballroom dancer!" He faced me now.

"I raised you to be a man among men!" He roared. "I raised you to appreciate women!"

"DAD! I like girls!" I spat in disgust. I caught the sigh of relief that escaped him.

"What would your poor mother say if she knew?" He continued.

"More urgently, what would your poor mother do?"

That was a thought I'd rather not entertain.

"Look, I've taken up ballroom dancing because Akane asked me to. I'm doing this for her. It's not something I really like doing in public. At least not right now, which is why Akane is mad at me."

They were obviously ill-prepared for this response, easily detected by the akward silence.

"I still don't like it." My dad voiced gruffly.

"Oh we're also participating in a contest…with prize money." I added for his benefit.

"My son!" He announced proudly. "You're going to be the best sashaying sissy boy in all Japan!" I glared at him, this time without my fighting spirit. How many hard knocks can your manly ego take in one evening?

"Thanks for that unconditional vote of confidence, Dad." I muttered as I headed upstairs.

I stopped at Akane's room. I almost knocked on her door but I paused. 'No, if I'm going to apologize I'm going to need a game plan.' I thought. I needed the roof.

As I sat there, perched in my typical pose on the roof of the Tendo residence, I noticed a shadowy figure below me. It took me a moment to recognize his glasses glinting in the moonlight.

"Mousse?" I called below. "What are you doing here?" I asked apprehensively.

Call it a force of habit, but anytime Mousse was around I frantically searched for an about-to-glomp Shampoo.

The figure looked up and spied me, nodding in acknowledgement.

"Sorry about what happened earlier." He offered.

"Yeah, things got a little nuts back there." Mousse nodded again.

"I need to talk to you…" He blurted.

This took me by surprise. The only time Mousse had anything to say to me was when he was issuing a challenge.

"Uh…what's up?" I asked cautiously.

"Er…well…the reason I defended myself back there…the reason I was acting so irrational…"

"You were trying to impress Shampoo." I answered flatly.

"Well…yes." He sheepishly confirmed.

"I just don't want her to think I'm weak. I don't know what else to do. The only way I'll ever win her over is if I beat you in combat--- which I will do by the way---just not now. I'm not ready yet." Mousse attempted to gather his pride.

"I think there might be another way to get her attention, if you'd like to hear it. But whatever you do Mousse, picking on defenseless drunk guys isn't gonna cut it." I rationed.

Mousse nodded in embarrassment. "You really think there's another way? I need to hear it."

I thought a little bit on the subject then spoke. "If there's one thing I know, it's this: If you want to get a girl's attention, you practically have to ignore her. Pretend you couldn't care less if she'd ask you out on a date. I act this way all the time---except I'm not acting---in most cases." (All but one really.) "Anyway, they never get the hint. For whatever reason, you're more desirable when you don't give a damn." I instructed. Mousse listened to my every word. He remained completely silent for a few minutes.

"Are you sure this will work?" He asked, breaking the silence. He raised a skeptical eyebrow. I was incredibly irritated. Here I was, being nice, offering advice, handing out all my secrets. What position was he in to doubt me?

"I don't know Mousse. Where has following her around like a whipped pup gotten you so far?" I asked in frustration.

"Hey! I do **not** follow her…" I cut him off with a piercing glare.

"Nowhere." He answered.

"Just trust me on this. It never hurts to try." I encouraged.

"Hey thanks…I'm really surprised you'd do this." Mousse admitted.

"Why is that?"

"Well don't you want Shampoo for yourself?" I let out a sigh.

"You know, nobody ever asks me what I want…" I answered remorsely. He stared at me in confusion.

"You're a good guy Mousse, I know you'll be good to her."

He looked at me as though I'd just spoken to him in Russian. I sighed and resumed my previous thoughts. Silently, without my knowing it, he left the property.

When I finally convinced myself I needed sleep, I left the roof and headed inside. It was far too late for apologizing.

'That's ok' I thought. 'I'll catch her in the morning.' I stalked off to my room.


	13. Chapter 13

Thanks for bearing with me everyone! I hope you enjoy this latest installment.

Much love!

UPDATE

Through the request of fans here is a list of songs used in this chapter:

Pretty Woman-Roy Orbison

Something About the Way You Look Tonight--Elton John

Fighter--Christina Aguilera

Fools Like Me--Josh Kelly

I do not own this music or the characters of Ranma 1/2 (copyright Rumiko Takahashi)

and do not claim to. Thanks! :)

-TheDivineMrsH-

I didn't catch her in the morning. I even got up an hour earlier than normal in order to catch her. She obviously didn't want to be caught. I could only imagine the degree of anger she was harboring. What I imagined wasn't pretty. It was a good thing I'd spent so much time on Akane's apology; I had a feeling I'd need something stellar.

I used the daily walk to school to clear my head. It was a bright sunny day, the birds were chirping exuberantly, perhaps things were looking up. It gave me a renewed sense of hope. Surely I'd get to talk to Akane during school…if not during class time, then definitely during lunch.

I didn't get to talk to Akane all day. I had plenty of opportunity. However, Akane ignored me every time. She informed our classmates that she wasn't speaking to me. They didn't seem very concerned by this. They knew the drill; they'd seen this several times before. They would stop me if I tried to confront her with a quick, "Akane's not speaking to you right now." They explained that she would speak to me when she was ready. Then they would return to Akane and urge her to make-up with me. They explained to her that it was obvious we were in love. Yeah, like saying that to Akane is going to clear things up. It was incredibly frustrating! Not any less true, but still…frustrating.

I was sure all of this would have been taken care of by now if other people weren't involved. It didn't seem like I'd have this type of opportunity until that evening.

So I headed to practice with sinking hope, a sulking face, and the knowledge that Akane was still angry with me. Practice would most definitely prove to be interesting.

I was the first one to enter the gym. I spent the next few minutes planning my next form of apology. When Akane entered, however, she beat me to the punch. Now there's an interesting turn of events.

"Look Ranma, I don't want to talk about anything other than our choreography project." She insisted.

"Akane, I just want…" I pleaded vainly.

"Ranma, we're up today, let's get started."

Without further comment, she got into position and I let it drop. We practiced our choreography without feeling or sentiment. It was as if we were two complete strangers who just happened to be dancing at the same time to the same music. The touches that passed between us were cold and merely a necessity. They were not invited or warranted.

It was torture. To be so close to her and remain so distant was more than any man could stand.

When our dance ended, I waited patiently for Akane to speak.

"You need to be snappier with your turns. And remember, **you** have to lead **me**." She coldly offered. Then she turned on her heel in the direction of a drinking fountain.

Though I was aching to apologize and resolve this ridiculous feud, I was obscenely aggravated. All I wanted to do was apologize and all she could offer was criticism on my dance skills. Call me crazy, but I was no longer in a Tango sort of mood.

Luckily for me, Akane wasn't the only one who noticed.

"Alright Poopils!" Casper announced as everyone gathered around.

"Today we will have Ranma and Akane's red haut Tango!"

I could feel the angry stares of Ryoga, Kuno, Ukyou and Shampoo. I wasn't worried though. If we danced the way we did a moment ago, there'd be no reason for complaints. I decided it was a testament to my insanity when I realized that this disappointed me. I wanted to give them something to be scared of.

"Please introduce the music you've selected." Casper waved his hand in our direction. Akane nodded.

"The song we've chosen is The Masochism Tango, by Tom Leher." Akane recited.

"Ah how very approopriahte."

Casper started the stero and the speakers responded with a light crackly-pop. As our dance commenced, I soon discovered it was more of the same. Akane never looked my direction. Our hands touched only when it was necessary. Akane's hard-set and stern expression never wavered. I'm sure that mine never changed from the worry and concern. Hell, at least we were consistent. When the dance ended, I was positive I heard crickets chirping somewhere.

"Completely lifeless!" Casper erupted, breaking the silence.

"Eet was like vatching ze piranha and ze porcupine on ze first date."

Casper's odd analogy actually struck a chord with me.

"You have ze vonderful music. Eet has ze drama! Ze Passion! Ze entertainment! Ze dance of love and hate. You rest on ze hate. You need to get vulnareable…and intimate or zis will fall flat as my chest."

Casper leapt up from where he sat and came in between Akane and I.

"Close!" He demanded. We hesitantly took a step toward each other.

"Closer!" He shouted again. We hesitantly took yet another step toward each other.

"Zat is not close! Are you afraid you catch ze baby or somesing?" He glared at me skeptically. He then pushed us together until we were nose to nose.

"Ah, zis is nice."

"Now you must dance togezer zis close at all times. Look into each ozer's eyes and we dance."

I used to think Casper's accent was comical, and quite possibly the strangest thing I'd ever had to listen to. Then I heard him sing.

"It tahks two to Tango, two to Tango, two to really get the feeling of rrrohmance.

It tahks two to Tango, two to Tango, two to do ze dance of love." He chanted as he observed our dancing.

"Now, you vill do ze dance again. Zis time to a rrrrohmantic…and how you say…sappy…ballad. If you cannot Tango to a love song, you vill never Tango."

As he said this, a phantasm of sickeningly sweet pop ballads raced through my mind. My Heart Will Go On, You Raise Me Up, and generally any Barbra Streissand song ever recorded.

I waited on baited breath…then I heard a familiar sound. There was a crashing drum beat, it was unmistakable. Next, I heard a familiar guitar riff. I was instantly sure this was the title song to a movie Akane had watched a million times.

_Pretty woman,walking down the street_

_Pretty woman,the kind I'd like to meet_

_Pretty woman…_

I lead Akane into a rather stiff Tango. I remembered the fear Casper had put in to me previously and tried to spice it up a bit. I pulled Akane into my arm with a brisk flourishing movement. The embrace was probably tighter than necessary and Akane cast me her notorious 'don't-try-that-again-if-you-want-to-live' glare. I smirked and spun her away from me dramatically.

_I don't believe you, you're not the truth_

_No one could look as good as you…_

_Mercy…_

I'll be honest, I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I didn't know how this tango would come across, but I'd decided that it would be anything but stiff and boring. I was going to make the on-lookers feel something, even if it was joy from my idiocy.

I held on to her left hand and she extender her right arm upward. Carefully, she lunged toward it, putting all of her weight into it.

_Pretty woman, won't you pardon me?_

_Pretty woman, I couldn't help but see_

_Pretty woman…_

I gave the hand I was clutching a tug and she whirled back into my arms. She wasn't looking into my eyes. It seemed that she was trying to look anywhere but there. I didn't understand her. Didn't she want to impress them? Didn't she want to succeed? This was her idea after all, not mine. I lifted her chin with my index finger, forcing her to look into my eyes. I wasn't going to let her get off that easy. It's against my nature.

_That you look lovely as can be_

_Are you lonely just like me?_

_Wow…_

I dared to move my hand to her cheek. To my surprise, she didn't push it away, and I didn't receive a crushing blow to the head. I lead her dramatically across the dance floor. The on-lookers and scenery became frantic blurs. My eyes were locked on the only thing of importance.

_Pretty woman stop awhile_

_Pretty woman talk awhile_

_Pretty woman give your smile_

_To me…_

_Pretty woman yeah yeah yeah_

_Pretty woman look my way_

_Pretty woman say you'll stay with me…_

_Cause I need you, I'll treat you right_

_Come with me baby, be mine tonight…_

I zealously dipped her. She smiled back broadly. Then proudly, she turned away from me, catching me off guard. She cleverly and easily escaped from my grasp.

_Pretty woman, don't walk on by_

_Pretty woman, don't make me cry_

_Pretty woman, don't walk away, hey...okay_

_If that's the way it must be, okay_

_I guess I'll go on home, it's late_

_Maybe tomorrow night, but wait_

_What do I see…?_

Dramatically, she turned around to face me, still smirking.

_What do I see?_

_Is she walking back to me?_

_Yeah, she's walking back to me…_

_Oh, oh, pretty woman…_

"Wonderful Poopils!" Casper shouted as our dance ended. He beamed at me with pride. I found it more than slightly creepy.

Shampoo sneered at Akane and Ukyou looked at me with narrowed eyes.

"Wow, Ranma…Akane…I didn't know you had it in you." Nabiki jeered. "Just think, now that you're embracing your true feelings…you could be married in a matter of days."

"Over my dead body!" Ryoga chimed.

"I'm up for that…" I challenged.

Akane stomped on my foot in protest. "Don't pick on Ryoga!"

"I shall vanquish thee as well!" bellowed Kuno.

"I do not approove of ze bloodshed! Especially ven eet es before labahr day and I am veering white. Sahv ze dese threats for after ze practice, ohkay dokay?" Casper interjected.

"Ohkay everyone, let's begin vis ze rumba lesson. Rumba, as you know is a dance of love…."

Cripes, why did every dance have to be about love? Why couldn't there be a dance about nuclear war, cheap beer…or even better, martial arts?

Who was I kidding? Nothing this glitzy could ever be that manly.

Casper proceeded to instruct the basic steps of the rumba. I was pleasantly surprised when I mastered them in a matter of minutes. It was the easiest dance by far. Casper came around and instructed me not to get cocky. He explained that rumba had little to do with footwork and much to do with emotion and passion. I've yet to figure out why that little speech didn't send me out the door screaming. I guess I just became desensitized to flamboyance.

"Now ze gentlemen and ze lahdies dance togezer." Casper commanded and the music blared through the speakers. He chortled sheepishly and turned down the volume.

Emotion? You mean I couldn't coast on the footwork? For crying in the sink! This was the only dance I had down pat. And it wasn't good enough to just…be good enough?

As I took Akane into my arms, I tried to be as emotional and passionate as an insensitive jerk was capable of being. Despite my annoyance, I began to have the time of my life.

_There was a time_

_I was everything and nothing all at once_

_When you found me_

_I was feeling like a cloud across the sun_

_I need to tell you_

_How you light up every second of the day_

_But in the moonlight_

_You shine just like a beacon on the bay_

_And I can't explain_

_But it's something about the way you look tonight_

_Takes my breath away_

_It's that feeling I get about you deep inside_

_And I can't describe_

_But it's something about the way you look tonight_

_Takes my breath away_

_The way you look tonight…_

Somewhere, in the middle of that dance, I escaped the commotion of my thoughts and everything around us. It was just the two of us there dancing in our own little world. It was euphoria; a world where we never argued or lied about our feelings. We were open, honest and completely in love.

With a smile

You pull the deepest secrets from my heart

In all honesty

I'm speechless and I don't know where to start

And I can't explain

But it's something about the way you look tonight

Takes my breath away

It's that feeling I get about you deep inside

And I can't describe

But it's something about the way you look tonight

Takes my breath away

The way you look tonight…

Oddly enough, Mr. Elton John used a time machine to read my exact thoughts and this exact moment and composed a song about it ten years ago.

After that evening's practice, I'd decided I'd been grievously neglecting my martial arts. I needed some practice, and I had plenty of things to get off my mind.

Practice had not ended well. I guess our rumba was better than we expected because Shampoo sent Akane sprawling to the floor as soon as it ended. Akane scrambled to her feet and glared at her, but thought better of fighting on school property. As if I needed to add to my own festering sins, I scolded Shampoo for attacking someone unequal to her in skill. I was promptly left with a sulky disposition and a rapidly reddening hand-print on my cheek. I didn't mean to point out Akane's weaknesses, I was only trying to protect her…but it seemed as of late, where my mouth was concerned, I couldn't get one damned thing to come out right.

As I headed out of the Tendo threshold, preparing for my warm-up jog, I heard a crashing wave of infectious pop music. It just so happened to be coming from the dojo. Suspecting the culprit of the insidious melody, I decided to check the dojo out before my daily dosage of sweat-breaking.

Just as suspected, Akane was behind it all. However, she wasn't practicing martial arts. I was about to interrupt her because I was sorely offended. To play that horrible music in a dojo, to be engaged in anything unrelated to diligence and concentration seemed blasphemous.

However, when I realized what it was she was doing, I stopped myself from interfering. She was practicing a tango. She whirled around the hardwood floors in cut-off sweats, clinging to an invisible dance partner.

_I heard you're goin' round_

_Playing the victim now_

_But don't even begin feelin' I'm the one to blame_

'_Cause you dug your own grave_

_After all of the fights and the lies_

_Guess you're wanting to hurt me_

_But that won't work anymore_

_No more, it's over…_

'_Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture_

_I wouldn't know how to be this way now_

_And never back down_

_So I wanna say thank you…_

I couldn't help but admire her strong legs and arms as she propelled herself across the dance floor. She'd always been athletic, but never appeared so strong. I stared in amazement, not wanting to disturb the moment.

I don't know where the courage came from that led me out onto the floor, but when the song ended, I was standing in front of her, asking her to dance with me. Akane appeared to be as shocked as I was. I immediately began apologizing for my idiocy earlier that evening. I explained that I thought she was incredibly skilled and that I had spoke out of turn. I joked that she'd better accept this apology because it wasn't something I did very often.

I can't explain why, but my desire to share a dance with her there in the dojo was unnervingly dire. The music changed from the tango to a playful love song. A rumba. I held my beginning dance position and waited for her to make a decision.

"Alright Ranma," she said. "I'll dance with you."

_I'm a kid with a reputation_

_For playing hard in every possible direction_

_She's a girl you don't refuse_

_She gives the kind of love you never want to lose_

_And I'm running round in circles_

_My little lady, she keeps me on my toes_

_And I got to got to tell ya…_

_Fools like me need someone like you_

_To keep me from doing the things I do_

_Fools like me need someone like you_

_To keep it all together_

_Keep it all together_

As I held her in my arms, I let my feet move of their own accord. I concentrated solely on her presence and the words of the song.

_I tried and tried to resist your temptation_

_I pretended not to hear your conversation_

_But there you were in your purple velvet shoes_

_Painting visions of a world I never knew…_

_And now we're dancing round in circles_

_And you don't mind me stepping on your toes_

_And I got to got to tell ya…_

_Fools like me need someone like you_

_To keep me from doing the things I do_

_Fools like me need someone like you_

_To keep it all together_

_Keep it all together…_

Neither of us expected what happened next, though it had been hanging over our heads for the past two years. In that moment, the two of us dancing circles in the dojo, I leaned in and kissed her. And it was well worth waiting for.


	14. Chapter 14

We didn't talk about the kiss afterward, nor did we talk about the kisses that proceeded. Maybe we would have if it wasn't for our spying fathers and the clicking of Nabiki's camera. Our eyes snapped open and we immediately leapt a foot away from each other.

Akane's cheeks were tinted the lightest shade of pink, the way they often did when she was angry or embarrassed…or both. When reality finally hit her she fled from the crime scene. I called after her and would have followed her if it wasn't for my father standing in my way. "Atta boy, Ranma!" He bellowed with pride. "That dancing really is good for something." I glared at him and would have beat him to a pulp if it wasn't for the fact that I love and honor him. However, love and honor couldn't keep me from grabbing him by the shirt collar and launching him into the Tendo's koi pond. Seconds later emerged a mountain of black and white fluff. Mr. Tendo backed away from me with nervous laughter. I suppose he figured he'd suffer the same fate (with the exclusion of turning into a panda) and decided to keep the peace. Now I could flag down Akane; there was nothing standing in my way…except one little thing.

I headed straight for Nabiki. She saw me coming and tried to run away.

"Nabiki!" I hollered. She halted.

"Hand over the camera." I ordered.

"But Ranma…it's a Nikon F6. And I got it for my birthday! It was very expensive!" She whined.

"Then hand me the film." I demanded.

"Or what?" She grinned. "I'm not afraid of a little water."

I sighed in frustration. She had me. What could I possibly do about it? She was a girl for heaven's sake. I couldn't fight her for it, that went against my nature. The best way to get out of this unscathed was to go along with her scheme…then out-smart her.

"What do you want?" I asked impatiently. "It's taken years for Akane and I to take this step; I don't want you selling those pictures and ruining everything."

"Why little brother! I'm surprised. I would never sell these precious mementos of your love…" she smiled wickedly. "as long as I have the right amount of leverage."

"How much?" I demanded immediately.

"Ranma really!" she huffed dramatically. "I won't take your money. You're family! Do you think I'm soulless? Honestly, do you think I'm that petty?"

I refused to answer that, but I cast a skeptical eyebrow raise in her direction.

"That hurts." She pouted.

"Would you just tell me your terms already?" I groaned.

"Well I…I'll let you know when I think of something." She smirked. "Until then, I'll keep the film until you have done my bidding. Once you have, I'll hand it over. You'll have my word that it will never come into anyone else's hands until then." She explained.

"You word?" I raised my eyebrow again. "Don't you think I deserve something more substantial?" In the hope that I'd catch her off guard, I lunged at the camera held high over her head. Suddenly, I felt pricks of immense pain throughout my whole body. It felt as though tiny gnomes were stabbing, kicking and biting me from all sides. Nabiki exposed the tazer she'd been concealing; though it remains a mystery as to where, and smiled wickedly.

"It's unwise to tempt me." She growled.

And so, I sold my soul to the devil for an undisclosed price. I was willing to do anything to get that film.

When I found Akane, she was in her room, drowning out the world with her headphones. I knocked on the door five times before she heard and answered. I knew she was there and knew exactly what she was doing before she even answered the door. It wasn't that she was a predictable person; I just paid attention. (It also helped that we'd been living under the same roof for two years. That definitely helps you to get to know a person.)

As I approached her, I began apologizing for the mess I'd felt I'd caused. She watched me for a moment, then shrugged. "It's ok…forget about it." She turned away from me.

'Ok, ' I thought 'maybe she isn't ready to talk about this.'

"Hey, I made a deal with Nabiki. She's gonna give us the film." I tried to sound as optimistic as possible.

"Great." She muttered. "I don't feel like talking right now, Ranma." She pointed toward the door.

I took the hint and started towards it, feeling dejected and bitter. When I opened it, I found my panda-dad standing there, his ear turned up, no doubt listening to our conversation.

"Bwrr?"

I grabbed him with all of my strength, hauled him down the staircase and chucked him back into the pond. I fumed all the way up the stairs and into my room. I flopped down on my futon and shut my eyes, willing the hellish day to disappear. I never noticed dozing off or falling soundly asleep. I did notice waking up when my father entered the room, still in panda form, and shook himself dry. Water flung everywhere, drenching my face and my blanket.

"Stupid panda…" I muttered and rolled over.

I never managed to get much sleep. I was so worried that things would never be the same between Akane and I. Then I thought of things staying the same forever. No change; both of us perpetually too frightened to become something other than what we were. When I did sleep, I dreamt of horrible things. I dreamt of Akane in a beautiful white gown, carrying a bouquet of little white flowers. My mind continued to paint the picture of Akane from our failed wedding attempt after the Jusenkyo affair. I stood in her bedroom, tuxedo-clad and nervous. "How do I look?" She asked innocently and I choked out something like "nice…cute." Every detail was painfully familiar.

Her bedroom door swung open and Mr. Tendo entered. "Father…" Akane greeted. "Akane! What are you still doing here? You look lovely dear. Are you ready? You don't want to keep the groom waiting."

Panic clawed at my heart and Mr. Tendo glared at me, obviously offended by my presence in his daughter's room. This was not what I remembered. I was the groom! Wasn't I?

"So if you've finished chatting with the best man…" He cast a skeptical glance at his daughter. "Yes father." She said meekly. She walked toward the door with her head lowered. She sighed heavily before leaving the room. I felt an icy grip on my shoulder and I jumped. "You'd better get a move on too, Ranma." Soun warned as he shoved me out of the door.

Suddenly, I was standing before a wedding alter and hundreds of guests. Across from me stood Kasumi, Nabiki and Yuka. I began to sweat profusely. I felt an urgent jab in my ribs and a familiar voice rumbled behind me. It sounded like Mousse. "Aren't you going to do something about this?" He demanded in irritation.

I couldn't reply, because at that moment, to my horror, Ryoga entered and took his place at the front of the alter. Trumpets blared and the crowd rose to their feet. Mr. Tendo escorted Akane down the aisle. Though she was smiling, her eyes could not hide her great sadness. She was brought before Ryoga and the officiate. The rest of the ceremony seemed a blur until the officiate announced, "If there be any reason this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace."

"C'mon Ranma! Do something!" I heard with another jab to my ribs.

"Ranma! Make me proud, Son!" My dad bellowed from his chair. All eyes were on me, waiting for me to say something. Akane's eyes shone brightly with hope.

I, as usual, blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"P-chan!" I pointed at Ryoga. "He's P-chan!"

The guests stared at me, bewildered. I tried to convince them further and repeated my accusation.

"He's P-chan! He's a pig!"

Ryoga tried to silence me. "He's crazy!" He denounced. "I warned you that he'd try something. He really has no self-control." He explained to Mr. Tendo.

Mr. Tendo very discreetly rose and gathered the attention of a man in a black suit. I saw him mouth "Get him out of here."

"He's P-chan!" I continued to plead. I caught Akane's gaze. The hope had disappeared from her eyes and was now replaced with fear and disgust.

"Akane, you've got to believe me!" I begged. "He's P-chan."

"Oh Ranma…" Her eyes widened in shock and then disappointment. She turned her back on me and faced the alter and the officiate. The man in the black suit began to drag me away. I didn't leave without a fight. I kicked and thrashed, cursed and spit the whole way. I never relented and continued to shout Ryoga's secret for the world to hear.

Out of nowhere, someone from behind splashed me with water.

I awoke with a start, soaking wet and panicking. Nabiki stood over my futon with a bucket and a maniacal smile. "G'morning slave. We've got a long day ahead of us."


	15. Chapter 15

Sorry Everyone! I had such a ridiculously busy summer! I got a new job and had to relocate. It was craziness! I didn't forget about you and I hope you all didn't forget about me. This chapter was again, exceedingly long and has been split. I hope you enjoy it.

Thanks,

TheDivineMissH

I was still in my sleep induced stupor when she pulled me off my futon. "What are you going on about?" I asked, noticing my smaller, feminine form. "You have a date with Kuno. You can't go looking like that."

"I have a…what?" I had to still be dreaming. It sounded like she'd just said "a date with Kuno".

"You heard me. Now let's get going."

Before I even had time to think she had pulled me down the hall. She sat me down in the bathroom and told me not to move. In a flash, she was gone. She'd fled in the direction of her room. As I waited, I pondered the situation. Why would Nabiki want me to go on a date with Kuno? Well, it would humiliate me. It would give me hellish nightmares. She could bring it up at every Tendo Christmas party for the next twenty years. I'd say it was safe to say that she had more than enough motivation. Honestly, she didn't really need any; she was evil.

She came in the doorway lugging what appeared to be a large tackle box.

"You need a makeover."

She smiled innocently and opened the box. It was filled with every cosmetic product known to man.

"Absolutely not." I protested.

"Ranma…" Nabiki persisted.

"I am not going _there_."

"Ranma, I believe you've forgotten. You don't have a choice."

With that she pulled out several items from the box and went to work. I was powerless to stop her. I resigned. After much poking, prodding, plucking, teasing and the alleluia chorus, she was finished. She pulled me around to face the bathroom mirror and asked me, rather deceptively, "What do you think?"

"I'm the love child of a child's finger painting and a pseudo-psychotic clown." I confirmed after a long moment of silent shock.

"Glad you admire my work." She granted.

"On to the next order of business?" I don't know why she asked.

We both knew that I was helpless.

"Where are we going?" I asked and mentally kicked myself. She surprisingly answered my question with a question.

What time is it?"

"It's about 11 am." I answered.

"We don't have any choice then, the discount clothing store."

I sighed, rather overdramatically and we headed out the door.

I shouldn't have been surprised when she exclaimed "It's perfect!" as she pulled the most hideous frock I'd ever laid eyes on off the rack. It was a faded pumpkin orange dress with chartreuse and yellow paisleys. Walking vomit.

"Go try it on!" She commanded.

I groaned and stormed off to the dressing room. As soon as I'd gotten the thing over my head, Nabiki shouted over the curtain of the dressing room.

"How does it fit?" She asked.

"I'm not coming out!"

"Ranma! You'd better come out, I want to see it."

"It doesn't fit." I pleaded.

"You'd better come out or I'm coming in!" I heard in response.

I sighed and headed out of the dressing room. It didn't take a mind reader to know she wasn't bluffing.

"It's wonderful." She stated, beaming.

"It's agonizing." I corrected.

"Exactly." She grinned maliciously.

"It's at least three sizes too big. I look like a walking clothes hanger."

Egh, the longer I stayed in this girl body, the less I liked it.

"We'll take it." She told the clerk in confirmation. I turned to go back to the dressing room.

"No, we haven't got time for that!" She instructed, hefting me up onto the counter.

Why didn't it surprise me that the other Tendo girls would have super human strength?

"Ring it up as is." Nabiki commanded.

The clerk cast one skeptical glance her way, shrugged, and did as she was told.

As soon as Nabiki had paid, with my wallet, she was dragging me out the door.

"We still have work to do." She confirmed and I winced.

As we walked briskly down the street, in the direction of a small coffee shop, I took in the surroundings. There was nothing out of the usual, a few freshly constructed flower beds, the backside of a few apartment buildings, a large dumpster…

When I noticed Nabiki had stopped moving forward I got a tremendous chill and I saw my fate flash before my eyes.

"Quick! Get into that dumpster!" she commanded.

"You've got to be kidding. Don't I look trashy enough?"

I tried to ignore my accidental pun, yet at an oddly inappropriate time, I felt proud. I'm just so naturally witty.

"This is excessive." I protested, unwilling no matter how futile.

"Every little bit helps."

"I'm putting my foot down…" I demanded.

Nabiki raised her eyebrow and the corners of her mouth turned up in a smirk, as though she was witnessing a child throw a tantrum.

"…in the garbage…"

I sighed and walked over to the dumpster, gathering all the air my lungs could muster. I held my breath as I slowly climbed inside.

"Atta boy." She grinned.

"Trust me," she said, much like an oxymoron. "The only thing you'll attract is flies."

As I debated which would be worse, flies or Kuno, Nabiki saw her opportunity.

"Now hold that pose," She said "I'll be right back." With that remark, she turned and was gone.

"Nabiki!!" I screamed, knowing full well it would fall on deaf ears.

A few minutes passed by in my lonely stink until finally, she reappeared, carrying a large bucket. As soon as she reached me, she hefted the bucket over her shoulder, poised to dump its contents over my head. I took in my surroundings again, looking for a way out. Something wasn't quite right. The flower beds. Dirt had been scattered everywhere. I looked back to Nabiki and realized my fate. The dirt spilling out of the bucket was a sign that I had made an accurate accusation.

"Is this really necess--" I had no time to finish that sentence. The soil from the flower beds came showering down on my head, filling my mouth and leaving no room for words. I spat and sputtered. It was putrid to say the least. As I peered up at her, through the dirt and muck, I noticed she was holding her nose.

"Is this really necessary?" I repeated.

I wiped the dirt off my face to see a bit more clearly. I noticed Nabiki was wearing a gas mask. She nodded emphatically.

Suddenly, I desperately wished that I had Nabiki's mask. Somehow, I managed to choke back my own smell and hobble to my feet. Nabiki chortled in response to my torture. She really could be a heartless mercenary.

"Alright, that's enough." She commanded. "We just want to turn Kuno off, not kill the poor oaf."

With that she lead the way down the street towards the coffee shop. After a few steps, Nabiki pulled off her gas mask.

"Hoofah! Ranma you're rank!" She exclaimed.

"Why did I take off the mask?"

"I don't know, it was definitely an improvement." I retorted. She fumed.

"Look Stinky," she began indignantly, "I'm doing you a favor. You could at least be grateful."

"Yes, thank you for almost killing me in the most torturous, grotesque, disgusting, and inhumane way possible." I added sarcastically.

"Aren't you being a wee bit dramatic? Its garbage and some dirt."

"Says the girl wearing a gas mask." I quipped.

I paused my fury long enough to take in my surroundings.

"Where are we going?" I asked, realizing at that moment that I was oblivious.

She gestured toward the coffee shop, as if I couldn't have guessed. That was definitely Nabiki's choice for an afternoon date. She'd have to go somewhere with expensive, decadent deserts.

"We're going to meet Kuno there." She explained, though it was unnecessary. I'd already begun to let that sink in.

I shivered again at the thought. I spent the remainder of the walk deep in thought. I was completely perplexed. There were several things that just didn't add up. Why would Nabiki profit if Kuno avoided me? What would be in it for her? I knew that they were dance partners but it wasn't like I was any competition. I only danced with Akane, as a boy. Akane and Akane alone was the only reason I was setting foot on a dance floor. It didn't make any sense. Nabiki's choice of dress for the evening didn't make sense either. She was obviously overstated, wearing a black mini dress and heels. Not to mention the fact that she seemed way more enthusiastic about this project than any before. She was more excited than when she'd made a killing selling my pictures all over school. She was almost…giddy. The eeriness was gut-wrenching. How did it all fit together?

"We're here!" She announced.

It looked like I wouldn't be figuring anything out just yet. I only had to focus on the mission at hand, make myself as undesirable as possible…and keep myself from vomiting at my own stench.

I saw him sitting proudly, trying to look casual. Naturally, he failed to realize this was an impossible feat. I was about to call that bane of my existence out for making me smell like sewage but Nabiki seized the opportunity and leapt in front of me.

"Kuno!" She announced our arrival with gusto.

"Nabiki Tendo! It's a rare occasion that I can say I'm pleased to see you." He smiled wryly.

'Yeah, right.' I thought. He was obviously giving her dress his full attention.

"Where is my beloved?" He asked anxiously.

Nabiki smiled, then pulled me out from behind her. "

Where is she, Nabiki?" Kuno demanded. He was not amused by my appearance.

Nabiki nudged me forward. "She's right here, Kuno."

"Nabiki Tendo! Do you think I've been blinded by my own grace and beauty? While that is entirely plausible…that is _**not**_ my pig-tailed god--"

He paused and looked me over a second time.

"Kuno Sempai!" I confirmed. "Pig-tailed girl?"

His eyes widened and horror set in his face as he mentally confirmed that I was the one and the same. He gulped audibly and nervously chuckled.

"W-where are my manners? Please, have a seat…"

He gestured to the open seat next to his and I promptly accepted. Nabiki made sure to sit across from us. I watched in moderate amusement as Kuno's pallid face changed to the slightest tint of green. No doubt he caught a good whiff of my delightful scent. I smiled innocently at him.

Nabiki pulled a portable fan out of her purse and pressed the 'on' button.

"Oh, it's so hot!" She exclaimed dramatically.

She then pointed the fan at me and smiled just as innocently as I had. The reaction from Kuno was priceless. His hand fled to his nose, almost as if he was going to beat the smell out of it. Then, his hand dropped to his mouth and he sprinted for the nearest restroom.

As soon as he was out of earshot, I glared at Nabiki. "

Aren't you laying it on a little thick?" I groaned.

"Maybe…" She conceded. "But we've got a job to do!"

I shook my head, for once actually feeling genuinely sorry for Kuno. The poor slob. He was unquestioningly annoying but he didn't deserve this.

Kuno came walking back, looking more humble than I'd ever imagined him to.

"Kuno Sempai!" I greeted sweetly.

"Pig-tailed Girl!"

He ran to embrace me but my smell hit him like a sucker punch to the nostrils. He stopped 5 yards away.

"Sorry for leaving so abruptly, something came over me. Will I ever have your forgiveness?" He begged.

"I suppose….if you buy me one of everything on the desert menu."

Kuno sputtered, as though I'd just knocked the wind out of him. Nabiki grinned at me.

"Well, uh, whatever your heart desires. "

He called to the nearest waiter and took the liberty of ordering for me. I took the liberty of correcting him and changing my mind every five seconds. It had to be getting to him the way it had gotten to me when Akane tried it. She could be great inspiration at times. Nabiki ordered a coffee for herself and smiled smugly. The waiter skeptically eyed Nabiki and I, however, he ultimately went about his business.

"Tell me my dear, what is that intoxicating perfume you're wearing?" Kuno asked.

Tears streamed down his face and his nose was red with irritation. How could he stand it? Why wasn't he cracking?

"Oh that…" I pretended to pause for modesty's sake.

"I'm all natural." I then gave him a wink. He turned green again.

"Nabiki, why are you still here?" Kuno abruptly asked, trying to keep his mind off the stink.

"I'm hurt. Don't you want others to witness the love you two have for each other? Besides, I have to make sure you make good on this date and you don't hurt my dear friend Ra--er Pig-tailed Girl. You'd better be taking her to meet your parents." She instructed.

He gave me a skeptical once over and winced.

"You really think it's best?" He asked her.

"Of course! All serious couples must take this step eventually." She emphatically stated.

"Oh...erm….very well." He concluded.

"Really sempai?"

"Of course." " Shouldn't she make herself more presentable?" He whispered to Nabiki.

"Kuno! I'm shocked! You don't want her to mask her true femininity with make-up, fancy clothes and preened hair do you?" She whispered back.

"Um…yes?"

"No! People will say you're a chauvinistic cad! You'll never find true love."

"You're right!" He shouted triumphantly. "I am above such things. Besides, I have a glorious reputation to protect."

In between the time the waiter received our order and the time our food actually arrived, Nabiki cranked up her mini fan to the 'high' setting and Kuno had to leave his seat at least four times. As the waiter made his way over to our table with my first desert, the bathroom door swung open and Kuno dramatically emerged. No one bothered to tell him he was trailing practically half a roll of toilet paper behind him. What a doofus.

The waiter placed my desert in front of me and distributed Nabiki's coffee. He then turned to ask Kuno something but quickly dropped the thought and clasped his hand to his nose the way Kuno had previously. He peered down at me, taking a real good look. I reached into the sleeve of my dress, all the way up to the arm pit, and pulled something out.

"Want an apple?" I offered him the half-eaten apple core.

The waiter gapped in horror.

"Not a fruit person, I gather."

I picked up my spoon, ready to chomp the delectable desert in front of me. The waiter turned toward the kitchen, relived to venture to fresh air.

"Waiter!" I bellowed. He turned toward me with a serpentine gaze. "Yes?" he hissed.

"This is cold! I don't know how you expect me to eat this. I have a very delicate palate."

"I'm sure you do," he mused, staring at the half-eaten apple core on my napkin. "but it's ice cream madam."

"And?" I added as though he'd just told me some boring fact I'd learned in Biology.

"It's supposed to be cold!" He shouted, losing his patience and at his wits end over the stink.

"Not this cold!" I corrected.

"Well, what would you have me do?"

I waved it away in disgust. He took the dish and was gone. This maddening cycle continued until I'd sent back every item on the desert menu without taking the first bite.

In a huff, I stormed out of the coffee shop, towing Kuno behind. Nabiki gave me a thumbs up, grinning from ear to ear.

"Well," Kuno mused, still in shock. "Now what do we do?"

"I'm starving!" I complained drastically.

Nabiki seized the opportunity and added, "We still need to visit your parents…"

Kuno blanched and then nodded, yielding to my every whim. It was quite sickening. What more could I possibly do to him?

He trudged, head bent in submission, to the Kuno household. We followed him.

"Time to kick it up a notch." Nabiki whispered as we entered.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

I'm sorry for the long awaited chapter. I know that it was such a long wait! I have been terribly busy these last few months. I hope that I don't disappoint you. Just so you are aware, I do plan on continuing this story. In its entirety, it will have between 20 and 25 chapters.

Also, I have a playlist for this story online if you are interested. You may listen to it here: .com/14466406155

There is also a link for it in my profile! Thank you for being such supporting fans!

"Tacchi!" We were welcomed at the mammoth door of the Kuno residence. Principal Kuno insisted we come inside. I never missed a beat. "This is some place ya got here Pops." I commented, trying to make my voice sound as nasal as possible. "Um, thank you young lady." "You must be…"

"Ran…ko." I interrupted. "Yes, the girl m'boy was telling me about."

"So, ya got any food in this dump or what?" I asked. Though I was acting, I realized what a mistake it was to skip out on food at the coffee shop. My stomach was very angry with me.

"Uh yes. If you'll come with me to the dining room dinner should be ready in a few moments."

We sat around the table and I observed the atmosphere. There was a huge chandelier hovering over a beautiful dining room table. I wondered how the Kunos' could be so ridiculously well off for a one income family, not to mention that income being a high school administrator's salary. I began to contemplate the Kuno's potential for mob ties. I tried to sound as uninterested in the small talk as possible, which was hardly a stretch for me. I continued to answer questions with one word answers until Principal Kuno became bored and moved on to Nabiki and Kuno.

When the maid arrived with our food, I instantly began to drool. My stomach growled audibly. As soon as the plate was placed in front of me I manned the nearest eating utensil (a spoon) and loaded it up. I was just about to stuff my face full of a delicious looking pasta when I received a brisk and not in the least bit delicate kick to the shin. I jerked my head in the direction of the kick, even though I knew where it came from. Nabiki sat across from me, remnants of a gloating smile still on her face. She shot me a look that screamed, "Get on with it already!" and I remembered that I had a job to do. I was to make Kuno and his family find me as unappealing as possible.

I let out a deep agitated sigh before commencing. I dropped my spoon on my plate, letting it's loud clunk and metallic ring resonate for a few seconds before speaking. "Who could eat this slop?!" I dramatically demanded. Mr. Kuno looked at me, shocked and mildly put off. It didn't take him long to recover.

"What's th' matter?" He asked me.

"It's cold!" I complained. "Unacceptable!" I sniffed in disgust.

Mr. Kuno immediately called the cook out to the dining room. He was made to defend his meal in front of Principal Kuno, Kuno, Nabiki and myself. He explained that he followed the recipe exactly and to the letter. He defied my complaints and cited that there was not a remote possibility of the food being undercooked. After Principal Kuno gave the cook a stern glare, he offered to reheat the meal.

"Reheat my food? I'd rather starve!" I scoffed.

"Don't bother suggesting another meal, I wouldn't trust your abilities to feed hogs. I'll survive on my ice water, providing you didn't lace it with mercury."

I waved him off and Principal Kuno dismissed the cook.

"Wow," Principal Kuno commented as he elbowed Kuno in the ribs.

"She's got quite the personality, hasn't she? She shows some real leadership qualities."

Though Principal Kuno seemed a bit wary of my hygiene and choice of ensemble, he seemed content with my presence.

I felt another swift kick to the shin.

"Ow!" I hissed.

"Not helping!" Nabiki hissed back through gritted teeth.

"Right…" I whispered.

Was it my fault that this family's idea of 'true character' bordered on the insane? What could possibly offend two of the most thick headed people in all of Japan?

Slowly, without thinking, I slid off one of my squashy, garbage crusted shoes. I propped my leg up on the table and flexed my foot mere inches from Principal Kuno's face. He wheezed instantly.

"My feet are killing me!" I complained nasally.

"I haven't walked that much in a long time. I---"

Principal Kuno interrupted me to remind me that even if I had the character of Gandhi, I was to keep my feet off of his polished, ebony dining room table. I removed my feet from the table and Principal Kuno called for the maid. He asked her to take his plate away due to his sudden loss of appetite. Principal Kuno then requested that once everyone had finished eating, we were to retire to the parlor for conversation. This didn't take long; after the foot incident no one remained with a healthy appetite.

When the plates were cleared, we followed Principal Kuno and Kuno down the hall, to the right and into the parlor. When we entered, I again, took in my surroundings. There were cheesy Victorian paintings of plump women with vacant stares holding fat babies. There were pink and red silk flowers filling vases of various sizes. The walls were papered, ceiling to floor, with a detestable mauve and beige pattern. I used this golden opportunity to criticize them.

"Geez, did an old bag lady decorate this or what? It looks like a flea market exploded in here."

Kuno's mouth dropped open in horror and Principal Kuno's eyes began to well up with tears.

"Oh Tacchi!" He exclaimed. "You're poor late mother!"

He was sobbing now. A blubbering mess of a man.

"She truly had horrible taste!" He admitted.

I looked over at Nabiki. She was glaring at me.

"I said to offend them, not scar them!" She hissed.

I shrugged. I failed to see the difference. It just meant I was doing my job thoroughly.

Principal Kuno massaged his temples and voiced that he was beginning to get a headache from the crying. Nabiki perked up immediately. She put a sympathetic hand on Principal Kuno's shoulder.

"Mr. Kuno, Ran…ko plays piano. She told me so. It might be soothing to your head and your nerves."

Principal Kuno reluctantly agreed and allowed Nabiki to usher him to an ugly, albeit comfortable looking chair. Nabiki then gestured to me, then to the luxurious baby grand piano in the center of the room.

This was clever thinking on her part. She knew quite well that when I tried my hand at anything musically involved, the only remotely accurate comparison would be to a hiccupping cat. I smiled graciously and seated myself upon the plush playing bench. Kuno's eyes glimmered at me. I could see he was holding on to the hope that what Nabiki said might be true. Poor fool.

I took in a dramatic breath, then commenced to pummeling the ivory keys. I heard music appreciators everywhere scream in agony as I really let loose. Throughout the entire performance, I smiled playfully, as though I was deftly playing a piano concerto. I hardly noticed when Kuno and Principal Kuno covered their ears (not so much from the noise as much as to make sure their ears weren't bleeding).

Principal Kuno was the one to stop me. He forcefully pulled me off the bench and dragged me as far away from the piano as possible. He sat me down in a fluffy pink upholstered chair which he deemed harmless enough. He took in a few breaths to calm his frazzled nerves.

"Isn't she…eh…something else?" Kuno asked nervously.

Principal Kuno shot his dagger-gaze at Kuno from across the room, pinning him to the wall.

"Yes…we'll discuss it later." He barked gruffly.

Principal Kuno took another deep breath before changing the subject.

"So Tacchi, you are in the ballroom dancing club? Is this young lady your partner?" He asked through gritted teeth.

I thought I saw a vein in his forehead explode.

"Uh…no." Kuno admitted sheepishly.

He gestured to Nabiki.

"Nabiki Tendo has been dancing with me. She's very skilled father. We certainly have a chance at winning the contest."

"Really?" Principal Kuno asked, allowing pride to creep into his voice.

He grinned, obviously relieved that there was still hope for his son's marriage prospects.

The conversation was interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and closing.

"Father?" called a familiar voice. "I'm home!"

"In the parlor!" Principal Kuno announced.

Kodachi approached the parlor and glared once she noticed Nabiki and I occupying chairs.

"Really?" She scoffed at Kuno. "I'm disappointed in you."

"Now Kodachi," Principal Kuno retorted, "Don't be rude to our guests. Tacchi was just telling me that he and his lovely ballroom partner have been progressing. He believes they are going to win the contest. You may want to put in more practice hours."

Kodachi rolled her eyes in response. "I've seen you move brother dear. You don't have a prayer. My partner has won a youth division championship." She laughed in her usual annoying trill.

"Well Tacchi, I would love to see a demonstration." Principal Kuno prodded.

"Well, we're only beginners…" Kuno refuted.

"Aren't you going to compete?"

"Well yes…"

"In a room full of people?"

"Um…yes…"

"In a matter of weeks?"

"Yes…" Kuno admitted in defeat.

"Then you better practice in front of an audience." Principal Kuno concluded.

"Kodachi! Play a waltz for us!"

Kodachi walked briskly to the piano. It was obvious how eager she was for an opportunity to criticize her brother.

"A waltz? We do best with Latin dances!" Kuno exclaimed.

"All the more reason to practice the waltz." Principal Kuno retorted.

Kuno sighed again and he and Nabiki positioned themselves into a standard ballroom handhold. When the music started they began to flow across the dance floor. Kuno skillfully lead Nabiki. Together they expertly and artistically emphasized musical crescendos and accents with arm movements and fluid turns. I was taken aback by their improved skill. I contemplated how many hours they must have spent together to improve so greatly in such short amount of time. What I calculated was nothing short of every day and every waking minute. I felt intimidated realizing how many hours Akane and I would need if we wanted to be half as good.

I struggled then, to take my eyes away from their feet and focus on their facial expressions. Kuno was concentrating intently, I guessed, on keeping up with Kodachi's tempo. Nabiki was smiling peacefully and I detected a trace of a blush in place of her normally stoic expression. There was no sign of her haughty poker face as she continued to submit to Kuno's leading steps. Another kind of realization donned on me and a wide grin spread across my face.

Kodachi ended the lively waltz and the pair bowed. Principal Kuno leapt to his feet and cheered, his pride getting the better of him. Kodachi complimented them but told Kuno that he would have to practice twice as hard if he wanted to compete with her.

I stood up and in a forced, irritated tone asked Kuno to walk me home. I reasoned that I was too bored to be kept there a moment longer. I told Principal Kuno and Kodachi that it was nice meeting them. I thanked Principal Kuno for welcoming me.

We walked home in silence. Once we reached the Tendo house, I told Kuno and Nabiki to wait outside. For the first time that evening, Nabiki looked puzzled. I grinned, relieved to be doing what I was about to do. I headed for the kitchen, found what I was looking for, and emerged with it outside. A kettle of boiling water.

I instructed Kuno to watch carefully. I dumped the boiling water over my head, mentally cursing myself for not checking the temperature before hand. I watched as Kuno's face change from pure shock to disgust and back to shock in less than a second as he took in my familiar masculine form. Seconds passed and he said nothing. He was frozen in disbelief. I then decided to take the liberty.

"Yes, I'm a man…" I began. "Not only am I a man, I am Ranma Saotome, your sworn enemy and rival. I'm also the same person you've been sending love letters, flowers, chocolates and marriage proposals to for the last two years. By the way, I will be expecting a favor from you as gratitude for my silence on those incriminating facts."

I paused to see if any of this was sinking in. He was still gapping and still frozen. I listened for breathing. When I heard the sound, I continued.

"Now, when the initial shock wears off and you realize what an amazing girl you have here, I want you to grab her and kiss her, you got that?" I paused and waited for a response. There wasn't one.

"Ran---!" Nabiki began to protest but my glare silenced her. She smiled at me.

I turned and stalked off towards the house, muttering all the way back. I made it up the stairs, to my room and up to the roof without anything earth shattering. When I looked down from the rooftop, Kuno was still gapping, still frozen. I watched them for a couple of seconds before I heard footsteps behind me.

"What on Earth---?" asked a familiar and somewhat bewildered voice. I turned at the sound of it. She was glancing at my attire.

" I **don't **want to talk about it." I muttered defensively.

"I think I'm too afraid to know…" she concluded.

I motioned for her to sit down beside me and observe what was happening below. She did, just in time to see Kuno snap out of his stupor and throw his arms around her sister.

"Oh my----!" She exclaimed. She blushed and turned away.

I grinned at my own cleverness and decided to leave her there on the roof. I headed down to the kitchen to rummage through the refrigerator.


	17. Chapter 17

Note:

After quite a long hiatus, I am back. I apologize for not posting this chapter sooner. I had written ¾ of this chapter months ago but was left completely stumped on the ending. When I began writing this fan fiction over a year ago, I knew exactly how I wanted each chapter to flow. Now, the story in my mind is constantly changing. The ending will be a surprise even to me.

In an attempt to break my writer's block, I re-read much of the Ranma manga series for ideas. However, some of the gags just didn't inspire this type of story-line. I read a chapter of the popular manga "Hana Yori Dango", also a love-hate romance, and became inspired. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Side Note:

This chapter explores the darker side of Shampoo. I do not hate the character of Shampoo. However, when I re-read the ending volume of Ranma 1/2, I was reintroduced to this darker side of Shampoo's character. For those of you who are avid fans of Shampoo, I want you to know I'm not bashing on her. I actually think she's pretty cool...just completely wrong for Ranma. -_-'

Enjoy!

It was the day before the school exposition and Nabiki and Kuno's relationship, though officially established in private, seemed to be nothing more than my imagination. During dance practice, the pair incessantly bickered and bantered back and forth. If one didn't know them as well as I did, one might miss the different exchange of glances and smiles. I couldn't help but feel jealous. It was sickening.

Even they carried on as normal; I knew that they secretly possessed something that Akane and I had not dared to pursue…a committed relationship. We were caught somewhere in the awkward purgatory between friends…and more than friends.

Right now, we were focused on perfecting our dances for the school exposition and the contest. With the exposition being a day way, that meant we had three days to prepare for the competition. We were steadily improving in skill, however Casper had some heavy criticism of our dances. He explained in his crazy accent that we were being too technical; that we were "thinking too much". He advised that we spend every waking moment together to prepare for the competition. I asked him why and he said "to cure ze baby ahlergy". What the hell does that mean? Well, I guess it's not like I actually expected him to make sense.

Regardless, Akane took Casper's words to heart. She asked me if I wanted to "camp out" with her in the dojo and practice. In my mind, it only took .5 seconds to have an answer ready. I loved sleeping outdoors. A guy gets used to that sort of thing after being forced to do it for sixteen years. I loved any opportunity to be alone with Akane. So, I did what any man would do in my situation. I told her I'd consider it.

There was one person who wasn't too keen on the idea. Shampoo was devastated by the fact that Mousse was chosen to be her partner. It was obvious that the contact between them was forced and strained on and off the dance floor. I just didn't get it. Mousse was an upstanding guy who was more than willing to put up with her incessant nonsense. Though not as great, or macho, or all around kick-ass as me, he made an adequate substitute. Why couldn't she see that?

She immediately objected to my spending extra time with Akane. I know that deep down, Akane wanted me to tell her off so that she'd leave us alone once and for all, but my theory has always been "Don't make waves." I told myself. In the past, the faraway past, I'd known her to be a nice girl who was always there for me when I needed a break from Akane's cooking. However, I'd witnessed things to convince me otherwise. Regardless, Akane could stick up for herself. It was about time I gave her the opportunity.

So there we were, walking home together, all four of us. Akane was on my left, Shampoo was on my right. Mousse was bringing up the rear, squawking the whole time.

"Ranma no be with ugly violent girl!" She protested.

"Ranma stop by Nekohanten. Ranma good for business. Been long time since Ranma help out Grandmother."

I wracked my brain for a good excuse. "Business hours for the Nekohanten are eleven to five. The café is closing in twenty minutes. Maybe some other time, O.K.?" I smiled briefly before receiving an elbow to the ribs from the left. Shampoo definitely had a point.

"Shampoo…darling…" began Mousse as he struggled to catch up. "You don't need Ranma to help you close up. I'll work for free…anytime you need help. Besides, Casper said we need to spend more time practicing together. We could practice after work."

Shampoo's shoulders sank in visual defeat. Though defeated, she still had her spirit, as always. Her gaze bored holes through my shoulders and attempted to set Akane ablaze. She stopped walking and the rest of us, willingly or not, stopped too. "Mousse right," she conceded. "Shampoo have lots of work to do."

"Uh…then…do you want me to go to the café with you?"

"No point...go home." She instructed. Mousse flinched as though he was a child that had just been slapped. Shampoo shuffled off in the direction of the Cat Cafe and Mouse reluctantly trailed behind her. "I'll...see you guys tomorrow." He called over his shoulder. I gave him a half smile and waved. Akane nodded in his direction. The strained conversation between those two made it impossible for us to converse normally, so we walked the rest of the way home in silence.

Back at the Tendo house, I packed up a sleeping bag and a pillow and headed to the dojo. I knew in the corner of my mind that Pop and Mr. Tendo would never really allow us to be alone all night without supervision. They could have been lurking about at any moment. Oddly enough, that thought put my mind slightly at ease. I took off my shoes and stepped inside the dojo; tossing my things to the corner.

Not completely at ease, mind you. The way Shampoo had behaved earlier had me worried. I'd seen what happened when you got on her bad side. Her jealousy, especially where Akane was concerned, was inconceivably frightening. I shuddered at the memory of Akane's tiny body, lifeless and pitiful in Shampoo's clutches. Never in my life had I seen such cold eyes. Though Shampoo's morales were almost always questionable, I never once believed she truly possessed a dark side. However, that single event changed every formed opinion I'd had of her. At the time, I'd sworn I'd never associate with that woman again. Not long after, she'd gone to apologize to Akane. She would never be in my good graces without doing that. Akane accepted her apology and forgave her. She had cast menacing glares at Akane on more than one occasion. Also, there was always the nagging fact in the back of my mind that at one time Akane's life and death meant nothing to her. Could she be capable of anything?

There was a thud on the ground behind me and I jumped. I turned around to find Akane behind me, smiling, amused at the rarity of catching me unguarded. She'd thrown her things on the floor next to mine...apparently, she was not a light packer. I allowed my mind to be put at ease.

"Ranma, I think Dad and a large nosy panda are camping outside." "Really?" I humored her. "They're a little behind schedule."

I helped her set up her CD player and I laughed out loud as I remembered the last time I'd spent the night in the dojo. I had been perfecting my martial arts. It's a good thing I was virtually unbeatable when it came to martial arts, otherwise I'd be the target of every self-proclaimed champion due to my current hobby. Odd how familiar that sounds.

We practiced our tango and our waltz several times until there was no longer any moonlight to dance by. We called it a night and set up camp. Tomorrow would be a big day, and for some reason I could not feel at ease about it.

The day seemed to drag on. Each class painfully predictable. Each teacher talked in the same droning voice. I secretly wondered if teachers conspired to think up new...and yet incredibly dull ways to torture their students. Somehow, the thought of conspiring teachers was far more exciting than I should give them credit for.

I'd wished that our showcase could have been performed during school hours. At that point, I would have watched a seven hour convocation about goat cheese to get out of my classes. Unfortunately, the convocation had to be changed due to a scheduling error. The best time slot available was Thursday night, that evening, after school. I wondered if the re-scheduling would make it problematic for those wanting to attend. Students wouldn't be forced to witness our dances, so the turn out would inevitably be down.

I stared at the clock in my seventh period class as the second hand was mere millimeters away from signaling my freedom from those oppressive surroundings. "Ding!" The ending bell sounded over the loud speaker. I quickly gathered my things together and dashed through the crowded halls to my destination.

When I entered the gym, Nabiki and Kuno were already practicing their bluesy Cha Cha. The sassy chorus of "Don't You Mess With My Money" hummed through the speakers and I inwardly chuckled at the appropriateness.

I waited inside the gym doors for Akane. I let my mind wonder back to the night before. It was incredible, sharing those dances with Akane under the plush, lustrous evening sky. Two years ago, when we'd had our first match in the dojo, I'd never dreamed that we'd ever experience anything like we had experienced in the last few months. Back then, she was just my tom-boyish sparring partner, whom I just so happened to be living with. Now, she'd become many different things to me. She was my sparring partner, partner in crime, dance partner, potential business partner...life partner? I was much too young to be considering anything like that. Rational as I tended to be sometimes, I could never seem to stop myself from thinking about a future with Akane.

One profound thought surfaced itself from the corner of my mind and I voiced it allowed. "What will happen when this is all over?" At that instant, Mousse came striding towards the doors, wheeling a cart of costumes. Without breaking my train of thought, I opened the door for him. Once he passed me, I let the door swing shut. "Ay Yah!" I heard someone painfully exclaim. I turned in the direction of the voice and discovered a very peeved-looking purple-haired girl with a door in her face. Immediately I apologized and opened the door. She curtly nodded, refusing to meet my gaze, and strode briskly to the locker rooms.

Akane came in shortly after. She glared at me. "What's wrong with you today?"

"Just out of it I guess." I responded with a sigh. "Well, get with it before we go on, okay?"

I promised her that I would and we went to meet Casper and get our itineraries.

"You're on! Do your best meh little popils!" Casper squeezed Ukyou and Ryoga's shoulders as they waited in the locker room wing. Ryoga began to perspire with nervousness and as I watched them, perched on my bleacher seat, I began to feel the nerve-ridden nausea that they must have been feeling. I continued to watch them as Ukyou smiled at Ryoga and quickly threw her arms around him in an encouraging hug. She caught me watching them and shifted away from him just as quickly, her cheeks pink with embarrassment.

Casper never lied. There was something about dancing that changed people. It brought people together. I jumped a little when I felt a hand on mine. I turned to the seat next to me. I met Akane's worried gaze. "Are you ok, Ranma?"She asked with sincerity. "Yeah," I smiled at her and the nausea disappated. Why be nervous? Whatever happened tonight good or bad, right or wrong, I was given the chance to dance with Akane. At that particular juncture, I couldn't think of anything I'd rather do.

The house lights dimmed, the announcement of couple and dance was made. The spotlight flashed and the music was cued. Suddenly, Ryoga and Ukyou appeared in the center of the gym floor. They began their lively jive as the piano styling of Billy Joel came through the speaker.

Despite the glitter and glitz of it all, the most thrilling part of watching the show was that Akane's hand was in mine and all was right in my world.

When Shampoo and Mousse finished their slinky Fox Trot, we left the bleachers to get ready. It was show time.

The house lights dimmed. The spotlight hit the gym floor once again. This time, it was for us. My palms began to sweat. Gena and Daisuke shouted wishes of good luck over the roaring crowd. I swallowed back the fear that had surmounted stomach to throat. It was time to put the hours of practice to the test. How would the crowd respond to our dance? Would we be harassed and tormented until graduation? Would they accept our "relationship"? I took a deep breath. I was suffocating!

"Tell me you're going to be alright!" She whispered in a pleading tone. I turned slowly toward the voice trying to reason with me. I felt a hand squeeze mine. I locked eyes with the most beautiful thing to ever draw breath. She was a vision in black and red lace. Our gaze held for a few seconds longer as I tried to remember how to put words into sentences. "O.K." Was all I could manage and I prayed that she would understand me. She smiled and I could breath again. I led her on to the floor and we took our positions.

To my complete astonishment, we danced better than we ever had. The audience laughed when appropriate. There were the inevitable cat calls. There were a few obscene comments shouted regarding our "relationship" with one another. Fortunately, a faculty member asked him to leave.

Akane, my strong, brave girl, kept on dancing. It never phased her. If nothing else, it pushed her to keep going. Small stuff never phased my Akane. (Unless it came from me...)

I bowed and she curtsied, as our dance came to an end. We left the floor to prepare for what was to come next. It was time for the group waltz. If I was going to be nervous for a dance, it should have been this one. I was not at all comfortable with it and, truth be told, I didn't like it all that much.

However, what I did like was that each couple got a solo section of choreography in the center of the gym floor. I was confident in this regard because our choreography was the best. We had several elaborate turns and, even though it is frowned upon in traditional ballroom dances, we had a type of lift. The move consisted of me holding on to Akane's wrist and ankle as I spun in a circle. Her body barely hovered above the ground. It was very dangerous. That little move was difficult to accomplish and even more difficult to perfect. We'd had many extra practices with Casper to memorize it. He himself had suggested the choreography. If there had been any reason for me to doubt Casper's insanity, that would have smashed any and every inkling. Still, it was his insanity, his creative genius that we appreciated.

After the last group, Nabiki and Kuno, had performed, there was a brief intermission. After the intermission, each couple was reintroduced as they stepped onto the gym floor for the last time that evening. Each couple positioned themselves into a circle. The crowd was roaring once again, and everyone, Nabiki, Kuno, Ukyou, Ryoga, Shampoo, Mousse, Gena, Daisuke, Akane and I seemed to be feeding off of their energy.

Finally, the wafting piano melody of my favorite Queen ballad came through the speakers. We were gracefully following the formation and the audience cheered as they recognized the music. Nabiki and Kuno were the first to enter the center of the whirring circle. Each of them performed several turns and Nabiki's gold dress seemed to sparkle like a nearly-setting sun.

Ryoga and Ukyou were next to enter the center. Neither of them were very confident with the waltz and so they decided to play it safe with an embellished basic step. They quickly left the center of the circle.

Gena and Daisuke were next. As they performed flawlessly in the center, members of the audience lept to their feet to cheer them on. I exhaled in relief as I remembered we wouldn't be directly following them.

Shampoo and Mousse entered the center and it seemed agonizing to watch. She did most of the leading and he struggled to keep up with her. It was an outright shame to see two people with such potential chemistry fall apart, unable to keep in sync. It was easy to tell they hadn't practiced together much. And how could they, when Shampoo only acknowledged Mousse's existence during practices with Casper? When they finished in the center, the audience politely applauded.

At last, it was our turn. I led Akane to the center with ease. We completed a series of turns, each one progressively faster. I centered my weight as I prepared for the lift. I felt a sickening blow to the stomach as I heard something splash on the floor around me. I tried to find what I needed to be avoiding but my feet found the liquid before my eyes could. I tried to stop myself mid-lift as to not put Akane in danger, but the momentum was too great. I was going down...hard...and this would not end well. Despite the teetering and tottering, I slid to the right, my left knee breaking my fall. Akane...I had let go of Akane. I whirled my head around toward her, needing to see her and yet never wanting to see. Akane lay strewn across the gym floor, crumpled and disheveled. Judging by the unnatural angle of her right angle, it was a safe bet to say that it had broken her fall. My eyes narrowed with fury as they darted around the circle in search of the one responsible. They caught a glimpse of Shampoo just in time to see her tuck something into the cleavage of her dress. I turned my attention back to Akane who was struggling to rise off the floor. "Akane!" I tried to help her up. "Are you alright?" She winced in pain. Her face was pink with embarrassment and her cheeks were wet with tears. She pushed me away, as she did the faculty member who insisted she wait for a wheelchair. She half-hobbled, half-galloped out the gym doors and into the flooded grass. Her beautiful gown ruined the instant she stepped outside.

I no longer cared about the gym full of people, my peers on the dance floor, or Shampoo's blatant treachery. My Akane was hurting and I belonged with her. I charged out of the gym without a second thought.


	18. Chapter 18

**Update and Revision:** I apologize for the screw-up that anime kaz caught. I never mentioned Ranma's curse in this chapter. I don't know how that got overlooked and I hope you all don't hate me for it! =( I tried then, to make it work, as it were, with Ranma Chan and Akane. I'm not adverse to that. However, it just didn't seem true to the characters and the integrity of the manga/anime. So, that being said I have altered the chapters a bit. I hope you don't mind so much. 3 3 3 you guys!

I frantically searched for her. I had to find her before she could further injure herself. I spotted a tiny huddled mass of purple under a tree. As I spied her, guilt, frustration and helplessness overwhelmed me, and my shoulders sagged beneath their pressing weight. She looked up at me, remnants of embarrassment still lingering.

"I'm such an idiot!" She exclaimed as I closed in the distance between us. Her words were spoken so vehemently and abruptly that it startled me. "Why do you say that?" I asked, utterly baffled. Surely she couldn't believe this mishap was her fault. I instantly realized that was exactly the way Akane would feel.

"I thought I could be something different. I was tired of being just a "lackluster" martial artist. I wanted there to be more to me than that. Apparently there isn't anything more. I have nothing. If only I could be more like Shampoo...she's always been stronger. She's strong enough to be your...to be your..." She paused. "She's beautiful. I look like a box. I could never be a ballroom dancer. I'm a klutz. You've said so yourself; I've never been blessed with "feminine grace". I can't cook without poisoning people. I can't swim..." I cringed as each insult I'd ever hurled at her came back to haunt me. "What have I got? You tell me, what have I got?" Though her tone was harsh, her eyes were pleading. I swallowed hard before speaking. Could she be serious? I wanted to tell her she'd had me since the moment we'd met, but the time couldn't be more wrong. I'd just dashed her dreams of participating in the dance contest we'd spent all this time practicing for.

"First of all," I began, breaking the silence. "If I'd have found Shampoo remotely attractive, I would have stayed in China and married her. Lord knows it's closer to a cure. Secondly, you're incredibly strong. Both emotionally and physically. I was a nervous wreck in there. But not you. You performed like a pro. You never let the small stuff bother you. You're a wonderful dancer, though I don't have much experience in this area, I'd never want to dance with anyone else.

You are a wonderfully talented martial artist. And yes, Shampoo is strong. The only reason either of us has any skill at all is because for most of our lives we ate and slept martial arts. I would never wish that on you. You enjoyed a nice home, a loving family. You went to school and you were happy. All of those things I craved while I was training with Pop. I used to dream about the kind of life you lived. And I can't believe I'm going to say this. So help me Akane, you are the most beautiful creature I've ever laid eyes on....and anything I've said to suggest otherwise is complete bullshit!"

Somewhere along the line, my voice had raised considerably, which made the last half of that sentence sound louder than I had attended. I attempted to soften my voice. "Geez, after living under the same roof for two years, I thought you'd be pretty good at seeing through it." A half-smile appeared and it pushed me forward.

"What happened in there was my fault. I lost my balance and I let go of you. I am really sorry."

She was silent for a moment. She seemed to be taking it all in. Finally she broke the silence. "Don't apologize Ranma...it wasn't your fault to begin with. Someone tried to sabotage us. I saw it. You did what you could. I am willing to accept what happens mow." She smiled at me, her eyes flickering with determination. Some expression on her face, however, made me think that she had been somehow left unsatisfied. Then it happened. Two years worth of hidden feelings and unspoken sentiments came tumbling out like an avalanche. "You have weaknesses...we all do. But they are part of who you are and they are endearing. If you want to be a martial artist, be a martial artist. If you want to be a dancer, be a dancer. I know you to be a kind, thoughtful, generous, brave, intelligent, hard-working albeit stubborn girl. There are so many different sides of you...so many different sides of you..." I repeated the last sentence...hesitating before letting out what was bound to come next. "And damned if I haven't fallen in love with every single one of them."

She stared up at me, wide-eyed and tear-streaked. "Ranma, I love you too." She offered back. I kissed her then, but it did not last as long as I had intended. She tried to shift and she cried out in pain as she moved her ankle. I snapped my eyes to the neglected ankle and noticed it was twice its previous size and was turning a deep shade of purple.

"We've got to get you somewhere to get it looked at. I think you know who's closest and available at this hour." She nodded once. "Dr. Tofu." She confirmed. She tried to stand on her own and I stopped her with my hand on her shoulder. I wanted to laugh out of sheer disbelief. She was just too damn cute for words. I sighed and slung one of her arms around my shoulders and scooped her up into my arms. Then, I began to trudge in the direction of the clinic. "You don't have to do this you know..." She chided, her pride getting the better of her. I couldn't suppress the laughter this time and she bristled . "Right. You could always hobble there on your own. At your pace you'd probably make it by...oh...Tuesday." She smirked at me. "Akane," I spoke sincerely.  
"I need to do this for you." She accepted that answer with a simple nod. We smiled at each other as we walked toward the clinic, feeling for the first time a strange and extraordinary peace.


End file.
